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Bottom of Page    Message Board > Current Games > Random story game   << [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] >>
...were in constant radio contact with the Central Command Post back in the barn, which was operated by...
.....by three cows wearing white shirts and black suits and ties who reported to the milking parlor, twice a day to.....
...get a massage, a mud bath, a seaweed wrap, a cold-cucumber compress, and spend a half-hour in the sauna where they usually would...
.....pass the time of day, notes to their lovers, and 'hot potatos' of the 'white elephant' type to their.....
...bodyguards who were all too eager to bake a potato and deliver the mail. These body guards were trained by some of the worlds leading comedians and were able to perform many duties up to and including braiding hair while...
...humming the 1812 Overture in perfect unison with each other, even the part of the song where the cannons...
.....go boom before rolling, rolling on the river, which they could only do during flood stage due to.....
...the very strict local zoning ordinances which absolutely prohibited land to be used for "rolling or rolling-related activities", except if...
.....certain unofficial fees were forked-over to obtain dispensation to do that which was.....
...strictly the prerogative of the Lord of the Manor, who at this time was none other than His Glorified Deified Ossified Bona-fide Majesty, King Waldo The...
.....Missing, which left a lot of discretion up to his subjects until his ministers could find him. Once when he was missing and needed him, they found him in.....
...Aisle 4 of the local supermarket, where he was comparing prices of jellies and jams, trying to figure out which one would be the most cost-effective to spread on his...
.....Royal slice of bread when he can't get butter; though mightn't he like marmalade instead.....

Quote:
The King's Breakfast

The King asked
The Queen, and
The Queen asked
The Dairymaid:
"Could we have some butter for
The Royal slice of bread?"
The Queen asked the Dairymaid,
The Dairymaid
Said, "Certainly,
I'll go and tell the cow
Now
Before she goes to bed."

The Dairymaid
She curtsied,
And went and told the Alderney:
"Don't forget the butter for
The Royal slice of bread."

The Alderney said sleepily:
"You'd better tell
His Majesty
That many people nowadays
Like marmalade
Instead."

The Dairymaid
Said "Fancy!"
And went to
Her Majesty.
She curtsied to the Queen, and
She turned a little red:
"Excuse me,
Your Majesty,
For taking of
The liberty,
But marmalade is tasty, if
It's very
Thickly
Spread."

The Queen said
"Oh!"
And went to his Majesty:
"Talking of the butter for
The royal slice of bread,
Many people
Think that
Marmalade
Is nicer.
Would you like to try a little
Marmalade
Instead?"

The King said,
"Bother!"
And then he said,
"Oh, deary me!"
The King sobbed, "Oh, deary me!"
And went back to bed.
"Nobody,"
He whimpered,
"Could call me
A fussy man;
I only want
A little bit
Of butter for
My bread!"

The Queen said,
"There, there!"
And went to
The Dairymaid.
The Dairymaid
Said, "There, there!"
And went to the shed.
The cow said,
"There, there!
I didn't really
Mean it;
Here's milk for his porringer
And butter for his bread."

The queen took the butter
And brought it to
His Majesty.
The King said
"Butter, eh?"
And bounced out of bed.
"Nobody," he said,
As he kissed her
Tenderly,
"Nobody," he said,
As he slid down
The banisters,
"Nobody,
My darling,
Could call me
A fussy man -
BUT
I do like a little bit of butter to my bread!"

-- A. A. Milne
...especially the kind made from kiwis and cantaloupes which are grown in the field behind the barn, in a plot next to the strawberry patch, which is where last year we saw...
.....the Great Pumpkin rise from the next door pumpkin patch bringing gifts to all the little children who had been.....
The Pagan Pumpkin rides off into the moonlight on Halloween night. The End?
No, not the end, 'tis only the beginning.

Meanwhile back in the Forbidden Forest a group of nere-do-wells were.....
.....parading around like morris dancers, taking the occasional break to dicuss.....
.....the doings of the stock market, the latest in ladies apparel, and the price of AK-47s in the Canary Islands, where.....
..........various common party-goers of the island seeked free beverages in the most proper of fashions, crashing someone's..........
.....Bentley through the guardrail and over a forty foot cliff into the sea below where.....
... a variety of rare and exotic pinapples liked to sing, dance, smoke pipeweed, and...
.....and plan their annual trip to Toontown where they will meet with.....
....Tom, Dick and Harry. They will then play a game of....
....Brockian Ultra Cricket as played in the higher dimensions by .....
...the gods of war when they get tired of playing hide and seek with the god of peace. Yet....
....they would rather take the poverty stricken shopping for new shoes, caviar, and.....
...the apples of Freya which are rumored to bring everlasting...
.....fear of walking trees from the Forest of.....
...Cuddlestone where danger lurks behind every branch and yellow...
...flowers where it is rumored that black Urucks come to party...
...all night long while eating honeybiscuits and drinking entwater wich make them...
.....grow smaller and meeker, except for the one who.....
...got as fat as a troll and couldn't imagine what to do next as.....
.....there weren't any more holes in his belt with which to.....
....fit in his monstrous belly, but he did have an extra plan to fit it all in, first, he would....
.....throw away his belt and don rainbow colored suspenders while standing with one foot in the.....
...muddy pool outside his rented apartment. Then he would....
.....flap his arms like a humming bird a lift himself from the.....
...ground floor to the topfloor where he would enjoy his meal with the...
.....current occupant of the penthouse, who made his fortune selling.....
...rotten apples, oranges, and peers to black orcs of moria...
.....who were in training for the Summer Pelori Games, the Arda-wide games open to.....
....the fans of morgoth bauglir amd sauron. Yet most of the fans came there only to see...
.....the tattooed laidy, they came to gape and stare; "I've never," he'd declare, "seen such a freak so fair!" All up and down her spine.....
....he danced to sound of San Fransisco and sang a dirge about....
.....the loss of the Big Bad Wolf into the boiling pot placed under the chimney of the three.....
...Horsemen of the Unsuccessful Lower Budget Apocalypse. They then produced a rake and proceeded to...
...weed the garden of Yavanna and they were rewarded by obtaining some seeds to.....
.....miniature Mallorn trees they planted in pots placed under the newborn sun until.....
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