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*[plz ppl, continue this thread!]*

Then, they saw a black speck falling from the sky. It was the Withc-King of Angmar, on Ancalagon the Black!

"Ankly! I thought you were dead!" cried Gandalf.
Angmar dismounted the Beast and flew to the ground; he pulled out a massive greatsword of obsidian and steel; proceeding to chop off Galadriel's head, since he had mistaken her for Éowyn. The blade fell with blinding speed and the Jewel of the Noldor stood there, dazed.
Then, when it was a hair's breadth away from her neck, she took her two hands and smashed them on either side of the blade, stoping it; whilst throwing the Captain of Carn Dûm out of the air and onto the ground.
"What business does a Black One and a Dragon have in the lands of Men and Elves? Speak quickly!"
The Fell One hastily screeched out an endless defiant note, of which the following words could be discerned: 'Nubin sherkuk, rakhizinash, matizinashûk!'
Gimli rolled his eyes and said "So much for the legendary courtesy of the Wraiths! Speak words we can all understand!"
So the Black One hissed "I smell your blood, I shall devour it; eat it all!"
Sam started to whimper and said "this guys starting to creep me out!"
The company then decided that they were going to -...

... adjourn to Mickey-D's for burgers and fries.

Mean while the forces of evil ...
Were getting a bit p*ssed off cus no one seemed to be taking them seriousley, and there was also the fact that they prefered Burger King...
because they got free toys with the kiddie meals and the burgers were bigger than those served in MacDonalds! Plus Burger King made a great hide out, nobody would think to search for the baddies in Burger King because...
..baddies are supposed to hang out in big black towers and the like. But their plan was now ruined by the rival fast-food outlet. "Grr.." thought the evil baddie guys, and they made a mental note to get boss to destroy it in future..
but first they had to plan an evil plan of world domination. In the end they settled upon the idea of throwing bricks at Legolas. So they sent out some orcs to buy some bricks and pink ribbons, because one of the baddies wanted his bricks to look pretty.
Meanwhile, Gandalf was...
...getting drunk in MacDonalds. Yes, kids, now we know the special ingredient for McFlurry's.... or could it just be the suspicious looking hipflask attached to Gandalf's belt? We'll never know..
Anyway - "So *hiccup* about this *hicc hicc* war on *hicc* Wellington..." Gandalf didn't quite finish his sentence, as he suddenly fainted and slumped on his chair. The rest of them rolled their eyes and continued to ignore him..
in fact they were so busy ignoring him that they didn't notice the squirrels. That right folks. Squirrels. A vast, roaming heard of little grey squrrels sneaked past our heros and absconded with Gandalf. (I just hope absconded is the right word!) Five hours later, Gandalf awoke to find...
... himself a prisoner in a hollowed out cave in a tall oak tree surrounded by thousands of also captive haycorns. When he asked them how long he had been there, they appeared to ignore him; however, this he misinterpreted. Being mute they were using a form of sign language that he couldn't read because they had no hands.

During this interval the orcs returned laden down with bricks and a spool of orange ribbon, the General Store having sold all their pink ribbon to Aragorn for his party frock. The Black One took the ribbon and started tying pretty bows around the bricks.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Legolas was ...
Cornered, the evil baddy guys chucking bricks at his head. "Hey! Ow, that hurts, stop it! You might break a nail!"
Suddenly, for no reason at all, it started to rain Balrogs. One Balrog made a very clumsy landing and squashed Legolas flat. The balrog would later be described to the ploce as wearing a flamingo pink bikeeni and talking in a sweedish accent.
After a fail court case (they were trying to sue Aragorn for buying all the pink ribbon, they deemed the orange ribbon unsuitable for their evil puposes!), the bad guys headed back to their new top-secret-hide-out; the public toilets at Isengard.
Meanwhile, Gandalf was...

peeing!!! when Saurumon walked in on him!!!!

"Saurumon!!! get out!!!! I don't want you to see my..my...my...YOU KNOW!!!!!" Gandalf yelped

Saurumon left right away not wanting to be blinded for life by the sight of him!!!
Saruman ran away embarrassed while gandalf relieved himself.... fortunatly gandlaf had a plan (drunk as he was), he was wee-ing all over the squirrel army's huge store of nuts (acorns i think). When the squirrel army returned with saruman their prisoner (after catching him collapsed drunk after he'd found gandalf's hip-flask). when they saw that thier nuts had been ruined by wee wee they....

Killed or let's say tried to kill everything in there way including people. All the squrrels were defeated and gandalf and the other "warriors" had but a few scratches!!!

Unfortunatly, Aragon had desided that he was mortaly wounded, though the rest of the fellowship suspected he was lying in a vague attempt to escape Arwen. A pair of grazed knuckles and a brused elbow hardly count as faitel wounding. All the same, Aragorn insisted that he be taken to hospital, which ment they had to catch the bus there, 'cause the ambulance drivers were on strike. And, as usual, the bus was late and Gandalf through a hissy fit when the bus driver refused to accept his O.A.P bus pass. After a lot of shouting, screaming and squeeling, Gandalf desided that he was bored and turned the unfortunate bus driver into a cane toad. Gimlie wanted to keep the toad as a pet, but all agreed it would be kinder to set it free. So they kicked it out of the window, into a nearby forrest, where it began to systematicly wipe out the local wildlife, while building an army so that it might seek revenge.
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