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Thread: Merry Making at Rivendel (story board)

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Galadriel entered took one look around, shooed everyone but Valedhelgwath out of the room. When she had curbed her temper, she grabbed him by the ear, looked him in the eye, and asked him quietly but firmly not to play any more of these nasty tricks again. "And you will be lucky if Elrond doesn't take you out behind the woodshed for a little corporeal punishment," she added. Then she helped him clean up the mess.

When they had finished, they went in to their luncheon, all except Allyssa whose tummy was still a little queasy even though she now knew Val's stunt had been pulled using stage props. She wasn't ready for food until later in the evening when she accepted a little chicken broth, toasted bread, and chamomile tea sweetened with honey.

"She has a very delicate disposition," quoth Galadriel to any who would listen, "and it was quite a shock she suffered this morning.
Allyssa reappeared somewhat sheepishly later, having eaten plenty of chicken broth.

Elrond smiled when he saw her. She had distracted attention from his indiscretions perfectly. The other elves sniggered.

Allyssa accepted this derision with good natured acceptance that she probably deserved it. Wink Smilie
"Here, Allyssa," said Valedhelgwath sheepishly, offering her a plate of only slightly burned fairy cakes. His face was still grimy from a day spent clearing up the wreckage of the east wing, and he seemed unwilling to sit down. "I baked them specially for you... sorry about the prank earlier."
"And what about a cake for me?" demanded Glorfindel angrily. "I didn't get a wink of sleep last night with my sheets half turned like that..."
Valedhelgwath was about to protest his innocence at that part of the evening's foolery, but then sighed a quick apology in Glorfindel's direction. "And one for you, too, Master Elrond," he added, "I'll set to work with the super glue later and attempt to fix the broken glassware."
At that moment there was a loud neigh and a clatter of hooves. The door burst open and in raced Asfaloth - larger than life!

"As you can see" said Val, "Stories of Asfaloth's demise have been greatly exaggerated."

Asfaloth pawed the ground restlessly and snorted. Just as Elrond started to get anxious about the carpets, Glorfindel (who had now fortunately forgotten about his short sheets) stepped forward. The elf put his ear to the horses mouth and listened.

"What's that Asfaloth? There's a large angry red eye with an attitude headed this way! We're doomed!! Somebody save us!!"
"Don't look at me!!" cried Valedhelgwath in dismay as two hundred pairs of eyes glared angrily at him. "I didn't invite him to the party."
At that moment, a fiery chasm opens up in the middle of the room.

"Oh My!" said Glorfindel "Its the Cracks of Doom. Here? Oh well, why not?"

Gandalf tottered forward.

"Where is the ringbearer?" he asked mournfully.

All looked lost until...
Sam pulled Frodo by the scruff of his neck, out from behind the couch, where they had been hiding from the antics of the big people, as well as it seems, enjoying a chocolate cake, some of which was still liberally plastered around their faces, and which their tongues were still trying to reach.

"Here he is," said Sam.

"Quick!" exclaimed Elrond, "Toss the ring into the fiery chasm."

Which Sam proceeded to do.

"Wait!" said Gandalf. And reaching out over the edge of the parapet in the nick of time, separated Frodo from the ring before it disappeared under the molten magma.

"Oh, sorry Mr., Frodo. The Gaffer warned me about going off half-cocked, about looking before leaping. I guess I'm just a dunderhead."

To which ...
Frodo replied: "Sam you are a ninnyhammer not a dunderhead. You cant even get the gaffer's insults right!"

Sam looked perplexed...
As did Gollum, who stood even more wretchedly (if possible) than ever before, his bulging eyes staring into the gaping hole where the Ring had disappeared just a moment before beneath the boiling magma.
"My Precious!" he wailed in despair, "Poor, poor, Smeagol. What have those fools done to you, my Precious?"
Unable to contain his grief, the pitiful creature leapt forward over the precipice and dived after the Ring.
"Well that's killed two birds with one stone," muttered Sam showing no remorse, "and while we're on the subject, answers those nasty rumours that have been circulating about poor Master Frodo and the demise of certain wretched speciman."
"Talking of which," enquired Gandalf with a stern eye cast upon Frodo, "How come you still had the ring in your possession when you told us all you had already cast it into the Cracks of Doom?"
If anything, Frodo suddenly appeared even more wretched than Gollum had a moment before.
"My Precious!" he wailed in despair, "Poor, poor, Frodo. What have those fools done to you, my Precious?"
Also unable to contain his grief, he too leapt over the precipice to join Gollum in the boiling magma.
"No, Master Frodo, My Precious!" wailed Sam, unable to contain his grief.
Before he too could leap to his certain death, however, a terrible, evil laughter rose from the fiery pit. Flames began to rise higher, coalescing into a manlike form as the pit began to close beneath them.
"Call yourselves wise?" the fiery figure mocked the crowd. "Fancy falling for that old Cracks of Doom illusion. My granny wouldn't have fallen for that one."
Laughing still, Sauron, for indeed it was the Dark Lord himself, placed the Ring, His Ring, on his finger.
"Now, bow down before me!" he demanded of those cowering before him. "And while you're about it, get out of my pockets..."
Burying his hands deep within them, he pulled forth like magic, both Gollum and Frodo. Which appeared the more wretched is open for debate....
"Wait a tick, something's not right." said Sauron looking suspiciously at the ring. He took it off and inspected the inscription closely.

"One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them, one ring to bring them all and in the darkness-made in Taiwan-bind them." he intoned. "Hey... this isn't my ring!! This is a cheap movie prop! Where is it halfling? Where is The One Ring? Tell me or suffer my wrath!"

To which Frodo replied...
"We-ell," said Frodo matter of factually, "in just about ten seconds, we who have been celebrating here in Rivendel will be able to hear the roar from the fall of Barad-dr, because I've got this tingling in my ring finger which tells me that Uncle Bilbo and Glorfindal have finally succeeded infiltrating Mordor and have destroyed the ring by placing it in the fires of Orodruin. ... seven, six, five, four, three, two, one, ..."

Mervyn, Sauron's pet tree frog, who had just transferred from Gollum's knee to Sauron's shoulder, upon their egress form the afore said pocket, could be heard to say, "Oh no, not again."
"Poof", was Sauron's only response.

Now, you are probably asking yourself, "Could Sauron time travel fast enough to stop the ring and himself from going down the tube?" Aye, that is the question; and its not for me to divulge the answer at this time and place.
But nothing happened. Neither Frodo nor anybody else did know why. But actually it was Glorfindel who at the last moment became corrupted by the Ring, put it on his finger and proclaimed himself the King of the World. When Bilbo saw this, he was sensible enough to swear at once allegiance to him and so he avoided being pushed into the fiery abyss. But he was very, very, very worried at this unexpected turn of events and started already to think frantically what to do now to save the world from his new Master.
Meia the elf suddenly pops in and glares at the Nazgul.
"i thought i killed 1 of u freaks already! How many Westernesse blades do i have 2 waste on u!?" flingin herself 2wards the nearest Ringwraith, she suddenly notices the terrifyin lidless eye in the middle of the room! "did i say i wanted 2 kill the Nazgul?" she hesitatingly whispered. "i meant i wanted 2 give them a present" and she slowly reached out and handed them each a cookie. "there u go"
then she finally remembered y she wuz there. "Y WERENT LEGOLAS AND I INVITED 2 THE PARTY!???????? i mean, u cant have a good party w/out sum woodelves!"
(Gad-Zooks! I forgot about ever making that last post. And as I have been here for ten hours today, I am too tired to continue this story tonight. Mayhaps tomorrow.)
"hahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i bet none of u knew that i could travel in 2 the future!!!!!!!! hahahahaha! the boom that ur all gonna hear soon will b a nuclear bomb being dropped rite in the middle of Mordor! From there it wont kill ne 1 from Gondor but it will stay in Mordor and kill all ur precious orcs!!!!!!!!!! hahahahhahahahaha!!!!!!! and then we have another plane that will drop the Rings in 2 the top of Mount Doom! and u shall fall, Sauron!!!!!!!!!! hahhahahahahaha!!!!"Meia lafed triumphantly rite in front of Sauron's huge eye. "and then i will cut out ur heart bcuz ur eye creeps me out!"
(this is wat happens when im tired and had 2 much sugar) Wink Smilie
And then, suddenly and for no reason at all (other than Halo being bored) an elephant (a medium sized elephant. posibly a Botswanainian elephant, judging by the abnormaly spikey ears) fell from the sky, crushing Legolas.
Somewhere in the distance, manic giggleing could be heard. If I was you I'd ignore it, its probaly just Bilbo having another one of his funny turns. Disturbed Smilie

[Edited on 7/06pm03/1984 by Halo_Black]
Frodo turned from the voice and looked at the puddle that once was Legolas and said, 'That's all well and good, your advice to just ignore it, but what are we going to tell Sheryl and all those other fans of Legolamb? Oh well, let's see if we can do anything for the elephant. Does anyone know if there's a carwash in the neighborhood?
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