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Thread: The Khazad-dumish Inn.. Please watch your head coming through the door.

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Rhapsody cast Eruwen a worried look. She got up and entered the kitchen. There she found a small kettle above the fire, grabbed a mug and poured some hot water in it. From her packs she fetch a small bundle of herbs. 'Willow bark is the best medicine for headaches.' She mused to herself. After a minute or five she returned with a hot cup of tea for the sick Eruwen. She handed her the mug and fetched something else from her packs as well. It was a small bar and it said: 'Ered Nimrais chocolate: royally approved by the Prince of Dol Amroth.'

'Here you go friend,' Rhapsody spoke quietly and seated herself again on the bench near the fireplace.
"If you're feeling better Eruwen, and you think you could fit in the dumwaiter shaft. Then you might have a go at it.

The stairway to the second cellar is now blocked caused by the Inn's foundations settling after that earth-quake aboy twenty years back. So you'll have to ride the dumbwaiter to that level from the first cellar. I've only ever been down to the second cellar myself and remember it was very dark and spooky. So I don't know what lies further on down; I do know there used to be a good echo when as a boy, I yelled down the dumwaiter shaft from that second cellar.

I do suggest you take some stout rope, plenty of candles and matches for your lantern, as well as some rations and water, and of course your weapons. You can get the former in the first cellar and the food stuffs from the kitchen."
Eruwen looked at the tea and chocolate that were placed before her, and lifted her eyes up to the smiling face. "Thank you so much…friend," she said, adding the word "friend" as an afterthought, for it was something she wasn't used to saying. She picked up the packet of chocolate, smiling simply because it was chocolate, her favorite. "I haven't received a gift like this in quite sometime," she mentioned softly to the kind woman as she placed a small piece in her mouth. The rapturous delight this small piece of chocolate and warm cup of tea brought to her soul, instantly diminished the throbbing of her headache. "Thanks again, friend." The word "friend" coming more easily to her lips this time.

She looked over at Grondy as he spoke about the preparations she should make if she were to take the job and investigate what was in the dumbwaiter shaft. "Food supplies?" she questioned him, slightly surprised. "How long do you think it's going to take me to get down to the second cellar and how long do you think I should stay down there?" She became aware of the weight of her sword on her back, and felt comforted that her old companion was still by her side for such tasks.
Ar-37 had left his perch in the rafters for a seat near the kitchen door. He was clinging to the bagpipe like he would be swept into the sea if he let go.
"Eruwen....... I wish you luck on this venture. Few have been down the dumbwaiter and lived to tell the tale. If 24 hours pass before you return to this room, then me and any others willing will come look for you. Remember, they do not call this the Khazad-Dumish Inn for no reason. The cellars, they say, lead as far under hill as the great city of dwarves itself. Make as few turns as possible, and try and keep to the main passage," After this he produced a round pouch from his broad right-sleeve (This sentence is almost a carboncopy of one from a story I started writing the other day, weird!),"Do not use this unless your need is dire. DO NOT LOSE IT! It is just a smooth stone, but it will allow you to see in the dark places, where no other light will be brave enough to travel," He smiled and said lightheartedly," Bring me back some of old Gimli's thousand year-old whiskey, if you get a chance!" he placed the pouch in her hand and went back to his beer. (We should have this thread made into a movie, or better yet... published. If it was made into a movie we would all have to play our own characters. No one can, or wants, to imitate my personality! And I just can't see anybody else playing any of yall. Your personalities are too vivid, and yes that was a complement.)
Wow, thanks, Ar-37...I think... Big Smile Smilie

Laurel quickly ran to her quarters and fetched a very old, rusted compass from out of her trunk. She ran as fast as her legs could carry her back down to the kitchen, where Eruwen prepared to make her descent into the depths of the cellars and nearly knocked into the party that had gathered there. "Miss Eruwen, please, take this as a good luck token. It was given to me by my great-great uncle, who lived to be one hundred and nine, and he had brought it with him on many journies while part of a small band of Dunedain Rangers in the north. It was ever his blessing. It has served me well and will do you the same. Miss Eruwen, may Eru be with you tonight! Have you had any ale or stowed any away in your pack? I'll get you some if you need it. Do you have a torch? A knife? A rope? Custard in case you get hungry? Maybe a flute to play if you're lonely? A peice of parchment in case you need to write a letter..." She carried on for quite a while until someone interrupted her.
Rhapsody raised her eyebrows at so many offerings for the fair Lady Eruwen. Ah the Dunedain. Yes, once she rode with him.
"Whoa, Laurel... How long do you think she'll be down there? After all, the thing doesn't have to be bad... it was only whimpering at first, right? Maybe one of our stranger patrons fell down there... Most of them are here, though, so maybe not. I, too, wish you luck, Lady Eruwen... that sound is starting to get annoying."
Eruwen was in shock and a bit overwhelmed. She cleared her throat. "Well, it looks like I've taken on quite the job. Are you sure you can't offer me more pay, Mr. Grondy? Seeing as it seems I may be taking on quite a risk?" But then again, what did Eruwen really care? Life didn't matter much to her now. She mused how death might be a welcome guest for her soul if it came to that.

She gathered up her few belongings and took some bread, water, and dried meat. "I think this should suffice, don't you?" She said to Grondy, laying out her pack so he could see her provisions. As the daughter of the Chief Defender of King Thranduil, she was a skilled fighter and hunter, her father wouldn't stand for her to be anything but the best, so she wasn't necessarily scared, just surprised at the outcome of her willingness to root out the source of the wailing.
'Yes that should do nicely Eruwen. If and when you find out what the problem is, don't feel you have to tackle it single handed. If it looks like too tough a challenge, come back and report. If need be we'll dig out the stairwell, to get a team down there. And as Eva says, maybe it is nothing, like maybe the wind whistling round a corner or across a hole or something.'

"Now scuttle off, and come back quick, if all is well. If not, come back if you can! If you can't, hoot twice like a barn-owl and once like a screech-owl, and we will do what we can.", ' and with that said, Grondy led her to the dumbwaiter and opened the door to the shaft.

(OOC: I don't expect this to turn into an adventure, but if it does, it should have a thread of its own so we can continue our partying in this one.)
OOC: No worries...the partying will continue Smile Smilie. I don't expect it to turn out to be an adventure, but then again, I haven't figured out what to expect in the dumbwaiter shaft either, he, he.

Eruwen peered into the darkness of the dumbwaiter shaft, howling and wailing pierced her ears. She looked back at the people around her and took a deep breath. She squeezed her tall, lean body into the dumbwaiter, and waited for someone to lower her to the second cellar. “Anyone want to join me for the ride?” she asked of those surrounding her. “There’s room for a small person to squeeze in here along with me. Any takers?”
PICK ME!!!" said the dwarf, and held her breath. Everyone raised their eyebrows, for Loni was quite stout. And she LEAPED into the dumbwaiter shaft headfirst. And got stuck.
"Don't worry Eruwen," Grondy said as he picked up a bucket of rancid lard and a brush, "we'll figure some way to extricate this crazy dwarf out of the shaft before you are ready to return."

"Loni, how many times have I told you to look before you leap!", he continued as he applied a liberal coat of rancid lard to her midrift where it interfaced with the openning of the shaft. "Somebody get a rope around her ankles, and Loni stop kicking or we'll use hot oil from the french-frier."
Eva grabbed the rope that lay in the pile of supplies Laurel had overenthusiasticly pressed on Eruwen and tied it firmly about Loni's ankles. She then began looking about for those who had entered the insert-race-of-your-choice-here tossing contest, as she figured anyone strong enough to throw Loni ought to be strong enough to pull her out of a greased elevator shaft.
Grondy took the ropes end from Eva and threading it over a floor joist, handed it to the Inn's bouncer Troll. The Troll wrapped the rope around his hands to take up the slack and leaned away from Loni. POP!!! Loni became unstuck like a cork from a popgun: like the cork from a bottle of bubbly. She came out so fast she punched a hole in the floor above. "Shucks, now I'll have to hire someone to patch the hole," he exclaimed.

"Will someone please take little Miss Exuberant upstairs and park her behind a tankard of 'Ole Keg Dredgings' so we can have room to pass the rest of Eruwen's gear on down to her, should she request it?"
Ar-37 stood by the dumbwaiter, " I would like to come with you, but as you can see, I am not exactly the small person who you described should fit in the dumbwaiter."

(OOC: In real life I'm not that small. I weigh over 210. But, that aint fat for my height. If you want to know exactly what I look like, integrate the following characters from Braveheart: Stephen, the Irishman and Hamish, the really big guy. And for now, take away the beard. Leave some long hair, add cowboy boots,a safari hat with a feather in it, and a stupid-looking grin. There you have it, me!)

"But, as grondy said, we will take out the walls if you need help. Before you go, A ROUND OF DRINKS ON ME! I still have plenty of money left in my pre-paid account from when I helped Grondy out of his Rent-a-Monster situation! Remember the penguins are your friends and any dwarfs you meet escaped from the prison that used to be next door. Bring them up here, we can always do with a few more colorful characters!"

(Grondy merely separated the OOC from the RPG.)
Eruwen decided she was on her own, but laughed at the attempts of the hyper/lethargic dwarf (depending on the minute) to join her. She had a torch in one hand and her sword in the other as she was lowered down to the second cellar. She didn't light the torch though because she didn't want to frighten whatever it was that was down there. The wailing got louder and louder as she approached the landing, but just as the dumbwaiter stopped, the wailing stopped.

Eruwen tried to adjust her eyes to the darkness, but the blackness was so incredibly overwhelming that she realized her normally exceptional vision would be of no use to her here. She sat incredibly still, straining her ears for any sound that might enlighten her as to what she was in for. She heard some incredibly heavy breathing, which was very close to growling, and her heart picked up its pace. She felt something like fur brush against her hand and flinched (just a slight bit), realizing it was high-time to light the torch.

She unfolded her long, lean body and quickly lit the torch. The flame flared up and she moved the light around to all corners of the darkness, but didn't see anything. She turned around in a circle, still hearing the heavy breathing, but saw nothing. Something brushed against her leg, and she jumped back, her footsteps echoing in the chamber. She looked down and found two bright, shining eyes staring at her. She laughed when she realized what all the fuss was about, put her sword back into its sheath, and picked up the small purrrr-petrator. "Bring me back up!" she called to those at the top of the dumbwaiter shaft.
Unfortunately, the small purr-predator has more to it than met the eye. The feline leaped at the unexpecting explorer, and commenced in ripping the cloth from her legs. (EEKK!!) Winking Smilie
OOC. Hi CC! Long time no see! Smile Smilie

Amarië gasped. "Oh no, that sound... it is... oh how horrible! It is the sound of a poor kitty which is suffering from a serious lack of objects to sharpen its claws on! Oh the poor thing! Wood, Eruwen! Use the torch! The t-o-r-ch!! Someone, throw some fish down there!"
Grondy rushed to the freezer and grabbing a frozen mackerel, raced back to the dumbwaiter. He tossed the still hard frozen fish down to Eruwen, which rather than being helpful, caught her on upside the head, "Oops! Sorry Eruwen. I owe you one."

Meanwhile the poor purr-perpetrator had reached Eruwen's back and was still scrabbling; scrabbling ever higher in its attempt to free itself from the prison in which it had become entrapped a week ago last Wednesday.
Ar-37 picked up a stool and raced into the dumbwaiter screaming, "HIEEEEEEEEEEEEEIEE!" and suddenly slipped. Falling head-over-heels, he became stuck halfway down the passage. The stool nearly reached the cat who promptly devoured it, and its stomach took on the shape of the kitty.
"I have named the kitty Fwuffypoo and he is my new friend!" Ar-37 called from the passage.
Wow, fwuffypoo eh? What about puffyturd? Nah I'm just joking. Gloryfindel looking at the cat down the dumbwaiter thought of how much it resembled a cat he had seen on a poster a couple days ago.

OOC:Hello, I haven't posted for a while cuz I was on vacation but I'm back now yay!
OOC: I'll post more soon...but a quick question -- Who is Crystal Caves? And is he/she the GM?
OOC: No, just a previous poster... Grondy is the acting GM for Gimli_axe_wielder, who started the Khaz-Dumish. Crystle caves entered on pg. 44 (I think) and is on the list of already-sungs in the first post.

Eva joined Glory findel in staring down the shaft. "I'm not sure how we'll ever get them out, unless someone can use a lasoo. I can't reach Ar-edain's legs to tie a rope around them like we did with Loni... Is there anyway to the cellars besides the dumbwaiter shaft, Grondy? Maybe the bouncer or another of Amarie's critters could push them up..."
OOC: Well, in that case, I guess my point is how can he/she control the actions of the cat? It would be like me starting to control the actions of the dragon hanging onto Amarie...right? But, anyway, I guess I'll just go with it...
"We are having to use the dumbwaiter shaft for access to the lower cellars specifically because the stairwell below the first cellar is plugged with debris: like four-man stones, shattered beams, broken crockery, and the remains of ancient skeletons. If necessary I can have the bouncer troll start digging it out, maybe even try to harness some of Loni's exuberance toward that end, but it might take at least a week," said Grondy.

"How about if we pour some fish oil into the shaft and the cat wanting to get to it, will eat its way out?" he continued. "No? I don't suppose that would be fair to the cat. Then how about we get a long pole with a blunt end and extrude AR-37 the rest of the way on down, opening the shaft for Eruwen's and the cat's return via the rope. AR37 can climb out after a crash diet or by removing the rubble from the lower-end, while the troll and company work on the upper end? This will also help AR-37 reduce his girth. Let me know if you can think of a better method to extricate our hero and the Purr-pet-rater from the maws of the underdark, while leaving the plugee to stew in his own juices, on a twenty foot pole, given a long enough rope, or whatever," he concluded with a wink.

OOC: I figured the cat's clawing didn't mess too much with the story, though AR-37 certainly did plug up the works.
OOC: Not nice to steal someones kitty, but I am sure they just wanted to borrow him/her...

"It ate the chair?" Exclaimed Amarië. "The poor thing must have gotten a nasty old down there if it ate the chair and ignored the macrell... Then the fish oil trick probably wouldn't work, but it might make mr Ar-Edain slippery enough for the troll to get a hold if him. It might also mean the end of Laurels fish oils soupe.." Amarië shivered and felt a bit sick by just thinking about it. ".. which of course would be oh so sad, but we may just have to make that sacrifice."

She was silent for a few seconds. "Or, we could see if the Slippy-Slidy slugs are willing to work with us today. Though they are very quick, and very unpredictable, and might turn this whole place into a green, slimy, slippery pit of goo before you have time to say 'yuck!'... "
"Worse things have probably happpened to this inn... but I don't really want to have to clean all that slime up. If you think you can get them to be friendly, though, that may be our best bet- maybe combine their efforts with the fish oil?"
Eruwen screamed as the cat clawed its way through her clothes and into her skin. Then she felt something hit her upside the head, right in the spot where she had smacked it on the beam upstairs and she screamed out again in pain. She was happy once the cat found another victim, but soon realized that she had lost her torch during the spastic display. “Grrrrr…” she growled back at the cat. “You fuzzy, good-for-nothing, curse of Mordor…” she kept mumbling some such oddities as she fumbled around on the floor of the cellar feeling for her torch.

Once she found it, she lit it once again with the flint in her pack and saw the kitten sitting in the dumbwaiter shaft staring at her with big, innocent eyes. “Oh no you don’t, that trick won’t work on me again,” she said shaking her finger at the cat. It meowed softly in return and started to walk toward her. She stepped wide of it and made her way to the shaft, looking up inside where she had heard a huge commotion.

It so happened that she saw another two big eyes staring at her. “Well, well, well…what have we here?” she said to the man hanging down in the shaft. “You’re not helping me much, are you?” She stood up in the shaft, stretching her fingers up to Ar-37. “I think I can just reach you. Perhaps I can pull you down?” She jumped as high as she could in the narrow shaft and just caught on to his wrists. Just as she did this, she realized it probably wasn't a very good idea and that she should have just asked someone above him to lasso his foot and pull him up.
"Hold still AR-37," said Grondy as he tried to drop the loop around the stuckee's thrashing legs. On the fourth try he finally managed to get the lasso in place and slowly took up the slack, tightening the loop around the fat Dunedain's knees. "Okay, everybody grab ahold of the rope and on the count of three, heave."

"One ...... TWO ..... THREAVE!"
"The Anthem"

It's a new day
But it all feels old
It's a good life,
That's what I'm told
But everything, it all just feels the same


And my high school
It felt more to me
Like a jail cell,
A penitentiary
My time spent there, it only made me see


That I don't ever wanna be like you
I don't wanna do the things you do
I'm never gonna hear the words you say
And I don't ever wanna,
I don't ever wanna be


You
Don't wanna be just like you
What I'm sayin' is
This is the anthem
Throw all your hands up
You
Don't wanna be you


"Go to college,
A university
Get a real job"
That's what they say to me
But I could never live the way they want
I'm gonna get by
And just do my time
Out of step while
They all get in line
I'm just a Minor Threat so pay no mind


Do you really wanna be like them?
Do you really wanna be another trend?
Do you wanna be part of their crowd?
Cause I don't ever wanna
I don't ever wanna be


You
Don't wanna be just like you
What I'm sayin' is
This is the anthem
Throw all your hands up
You
Don't wanna be you


You
Don't wanna be just like you
What I'm sayin' is
This is the anthem
Throw all your hands up
Y'all got to feel me, sing if you're with me
You
Don't wanna be just like you (just like you)
This is the anthem
Throw all your hands up
Y'all got to feel me, sing if you're with me
Another loser anthem (Whoa-oh)
Another loser anthem (Whoa-oh)
Another loser anthem (Whoa-oh)

Moderator Smilie I removed three extraneous lines from the above as they didn't meet our website rules. - Grondy Moderator Smilie
Kinda Gothic that, wasn't it? Anyway, here's a tankard of Gimli's finest for ye Hooded Rider and a plate of Spicy Balrog Wings to go with it. Orc Smiling Smilie
As Smeagol lurked nearer to the Khazad-dumish Inn, he saw the sign saying to watch your head. Smeagol ignored it as he was of Hobbit size, he walked into the Inn, noticing all the friendly faces here, he thought he would stay around for awhile. He sees a chair to sit down at so he can eat his newly caught fish

Smeagol has come!!! w00t w00t
Eva comes up to Grondy. "Um Grondy? I just found out that there's some... personal business I need to take care of kind of near here. It should take about a week. Can I get that much off? I'll try to rustle Fin into working harder... I hate to leave you and Laurel alone with all this, but I really need to do this."

OOC: yes, really, I won't be posting, see my journal.
"Oki doke Eva, we will hold the fort until you get back."

Hello little feller," says Grondy to the greenish-grey creature who looked like something no self-respecting cat would drag in, "I won't insult you by trying to cook your fish, but would you like something to drink with your sushi; or maybe we could fry you up some nice salted chips to go with it."

" How some ever, according to Gimli's sign over the bar (at the beginning of this thread), before I can pour you something to drink, you have to sing a song or something."
OOC: I'm so sorry for not posting recently... I've barely been on the computer.... >< I need LESS of a social life...

Goes up to Eva. "I'm ready to start working. What do I do?"
Grondy noticing that Fin is talking to a post, hurrys over and says, "Hi Fin, Eva is on vacation this week, so until she gets back to get you started, with what ever she had in mind, I'll give you some tasks that need doing.

For starters sweep the upstairs rooms daily and change all the linens there on Monday mornings, the exception to this is Loni's room, as she always sleeps on or under her table. Assist Laurel with the cooking when she needs you as well as the washing up, table waiting, and grocery shopping. If you still find yourself with nothing to do, ask her if there is any mending.

When Eva gets back, she'll put you to work for real, but at the same wages as now, which are two silver pennys a week plus room and board. You can have Sundays and Thursday afternoons off. I'll furnish three clean aprons daily. Payday is noon on Saturdays. Any questions?

Oh, and don't tease the house troll: good bouncers are hard to come by and he's a little touchy about his weight."
"Hello?!" Eruwen called out from the second cellar. "Can anyone hear me? Uh...would you mind helping me out of here?"

"Meow!" the cat said, echoing her sentiments.
There wasn't much entertainment left by the shaft since everybody seemed to be distracted by other things. Amarië strolls over to the troll and asks if he would be so kind to remove Ar-37s boots. (Trolls can handle strong smells quite well.) With Laurels feather duster, she tickles Ar-37s feet, hoping that the vibrations from the laughing would shake him loose from the shaft.

"This is both entertaining and helpful!" she grinned.
Grondy looked at the rubble filled stairwell and decided to put the troll to work clearing it. "An Ent sure would come in handy about now," he thought to himself, "but I suppose it would take longer to get him to accept the job than it will take the troll to get it cleaned out."

"How's it going, Amarie? Any action yet or should we get Loni down here to see if she can tease Ar-37 out? It's a good thing Eruwen took along some extra food. And I hope she doesn't feed any to Ar-37, for we may just have to starve him out."
OOC:
Quote:
Eva lilith Posted Friday 25th March 2005 (08:53pm)

Eva comes up to Grondy. "Um Grondy? I just found out that there's some... personal business I need to take care of kind of near here. It should take about a week. Can I get that much off? I'll try to rustle Fin into working harder...

Quote:
Grondmaster Posted Thursday 31st March 2005 (01:39am)

Grondy noticing that Fin is talking to a post, hurrys over and says, "Hi Fin, Eva is on vacation this week, so until she gets back to get you started, with what ever she had in mind, I'll give you some tasks that need doing.

Umm... the rustle Fin comment probably should have been OOC- I know her in "real life." Sorry for any confusion- whatever needs doing is all she's supposed to do.

Eva walks up to the Khaz-Dumish Inn. After the past week, she is ready for that friendly-if-chaotic atmosphere. Walking through the door, she feels a strange wrenching. Looking around, she notices that little has changed since she left- Ar-edain and Eruwen are even still stuck in the dumbwaiter shaft. Hmm.. she thought, maybe I didn't need to worry about leaving them for so long. Time seems to pass differently here- either that, or Ar-edain was really, really stuck! "Well, Mr. Grondy, I'm back!"
OOC: Wow, slow week...
Eruwen sat down on the floor of the cellar, biding her time. She had made a makeshift stand for her torch, which made it easy for her to see around her. She played a few games with the kitten, which she decided to call "Claw." She looked through her bag for some of the food that she brought along, and tore off a small piece of the bread, took a bite of cheese, and cut some sausage off for both herself and the kitten. Seeing some old barrels of wine and old boxes of whiskey, she took her small cup out of her bag, and held it under one of the wine spouts, filling the glass. She took a drink of the most delicious wine she had ever tasted. She drank several glasses in a row, and soon decided it was time to put out the torch and go to sleep.

She heard some rumbling up the blocked staircase, and was hoping that someone was at work clearing it. Before she put the torch out, she looked down one of the many tunnels leading out from the cellar, and a cool breeze floated up from below. She wondered if she should venture down one of them, or just wait until the stairway was finally clear, then at least she could get more food, and perhaps some company and then head down one of the tunnels.
An elf comes into the inn looking for a drink only to find that the inn seems to be in some chaos about someone stuck in a dumbwaiter and that there is someone tickling his feet. He goes to sing a song anyways even if everyone is too preocupied.

{Chorus}
In Darkness we do what we can
In daylight we're oblivion
Our hearts so raw and clear
are turning away, turning away from here

On the water we have walked, like a fearless child
what was fastened we've unlocked, revealing wondrous wild
and in search of confirmation, we have jumped into the fire
and scrambled with our burning feet, through uncontrolled desire

{Chorus}
In Darkness we do what we can
In daylight we're oblivion
Our hearts so raw and clear
are turning away, turning away from here

There's a well upon the hill, from our ancient past
where an age is standing still, holding strong and fast
and there's those who try to tame it, turn it into stone
ah but words can not extinguish it, how ever hard they're thrown

{Chorus}
In Darkness we do what we can
In daylight we're oblivion
Our hearts so raw and clear
are turning away, turning away from here

On Loch Etive they have worked, with their highland dreams
by Kilcrennan they have nourished, in the mountain streams
and in searching for acceptance, they had given it away
only the children of their children know, the price they had to pay

{Chorus}
In Darkness we do what we can
In daylight we're oblivion
Our hearts so raw and clear
are turning away, turning away from here
are turning away, turning away from here

(I decided against changing some of the words to fit middle earth in the end)
I have an idea that might help you get him out. If you put some grease in the dumwaiter around him and mabye allow him to slip through. By the way my name is Calin.
Eva turns to the stranger, who had almost run into her as she had not yet moved far from the door. "Welcome, Calin! Take a chair, and ask Mr. Grondy about your complimentary drink for singing your obligatory song. Would you like anything to eat? I'm not sure what's on, since I just got back, but Laurel's a pretty good cook, and there's always Balrog wings and Orc toes. As to greasing Ar-edain, that did work with the dwarf who was stuck there earlier, Loni, but Ar-edain is a bit bigger than her. Still, it might help, if Mr. Grondy still has any rancid lard left..."
I will take you up on the balrog wings. but another thing that might help is having a group of angry dwarves jump on him and kick him while the tickle torture is going on. everyone will be happy. especially the dwarves. It might be better than the throwing contest that I heard about with throwing dwarves. I think they will have a lot more fun.

Did I metion a round on me if the dwarves help and get him unstuck.
"Well, as far as I know, we only have two dwarves that come here often- Loni and Stonehelm. There is, of course, the legendary founder of this inn, Gimli_axe_wielder, but he has not been here for a while. However, Loni could probably do the job by herself, except that as we already found out, the does not fit very well in the dumbwaiter shaft, and it is probably better to only have one person stuck."
Eva runs into the kitchen to get Calin's Balrog wings. Noticing that there are not very many left, she adds them to the dangerously long list of things to restock on. As she hands the plate of Balrog wings to Calin, she suddenly realizes something...
"Umm... Mr. Grondy, why do we even HAVE a dumbwaiter shaft to the cellars?"
"I'm a dwarf! Everyone always forgets Ham! I gues sit doesn't hlep that I always pass out in the bathroom! By the way, I hope someone cleans the bathrooms around here...I made a bit of a mess!" Ham screamed running out of the bathroom and to the bar. "I'd like another mug of ale, please!"
oh well it was worth a try. if it wont work then why dont we all just clear the stair and then pull him down? and Grondy, would you like me to go shorten the list of things needed by getting things. or do you have some secret group that does it for you?
(after eating wings) those were delicious
"Howdy Calin, welcome to the Inn, here's your tankard of Gimli's Finest for your song. I think the dwarves could help if they had long poles and pushed from the top of the shaft; and there is still one bucket of the rancid lard left from the last worg butchering."

"And here's a mug O ale for you too Ulmo. Think you and yours could push-pole-propel that young on donw the shaft without getting stuck yourselves?"

Meanwhile the Troll had removed enough rubble from the blocked stairway to open a small shouting hole though to the floor below. "Yo Eruwen! Can you hear me?" shouted Grondy, "the Troll should have this cleared in another day or two. Meanwhile, don't stand bewlow the shaft for we expect Aragorn to come shooting dowm it pretty soon. And when he arrives, for Eru's sake don't feed him, for we still will need to get him up the stairway openning. And you and the cat should come out first, just in case."
"THat stupid shaft is causing too much trouble." said the dwarf, who was now unstuck. "Ignore it."
But then it dawned on her - dark shaft + spooky look = jewels!!! "ARE THERE JEWELS DOWN THERE? JEWELS!!!! JEWELS!!!" and she passed out with the effort of the thinking and shouting she had been doing.
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