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Bottom of Page    Message Board > Roleplaying Guilds > The Khazad-dumish Inn.. Please watch your head coming through the door.   << [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20] [21] [22] [23] [24] [25] [26] [27] [28] [29] [30] [31] [32] [33] [34] [35] [36] [37] [38] [39] [40] [41] [42] [43] [44] [45] [46] [47] [48] [49] [50] [51] [52] [53] [54] [55] [56] [57] [58] [59] [60] [61] [62] [63] [64] [65] [66] [67] [68] [69] [70] [71] [72] [73] [74] [75] [76] [77] >>
Eruwen smiled to Laurel, "Well, it sounds like we have an admirer who hasn't even met us yet. Nice voice, but, uh, how about we head back the way you came down? I just don't want any man or elf to think he lured me back by his voice. He might think I'm in his debt or something. I'm a bit touchy when it comes to that. I've been in the debt of too many people."

Eruwen hiccuped, a bit drunk from the good wine, and stumbled up the path that Laurel had taken down to her, brushing the dead warg out of her way.
OOC: thank you sooo much. I was trying to help Sad Smilie
OOC: I know Robbin...I was just being silly in response, for as you know the Khazad-dumish Inn is a silly place Smile Smilie...but, speaking matter of factly, Eruwen is very independent and who knows from where she gets her whims to do certain things; she's not very good at listening to others. I try and try to advise her otherwise, but she doesn't listen to me either.
ill do some songs tolkien came up with if you want
From over the hills and far away,
From the path may you never stray

Through the woods without dismay,
Full of luck and joy

There he met the elves one day,
And they feasted all night long

Until the sun rose the next day,
and they were all gone

Sang Valin in a merry voice as he sat in an overstuffed chair and drank ale. He then lit his pipe and blew smoke rings.
Grondy comes out of the kitchen with a plate of freshly battered and fried 'Watcher Rings' and places it before Valin talonarmor, "You may sing one of those if you'd like, but you don't have to unless you really want to do so. Are you ready for some more ale, or are you nursing that tankard so you won't feel terrible in the morning?" and he squnched up his face like a big orc grin. "Let me know when you want a refill of anything."

As he headed back to the kitchen he thought to himself, "I hope those those ladies find their way back soon, for we need another kettle of soup and the customers haven't been very interested when I've made me Stone Soup fer 'em."
" I'd like to order some deer and potatoes to go with my beer o' and a little old toby," shouted Valin.
Laurel led Eruwen up the roughly-hollowed tunnel she had worked so hard on for so long, and she asked her as they went, "Miss Eruwen, did you by chance bring up with us any of the fine spirits or other array you found down there? I'll bet there's a huge load of things that have gone forgotten...wish that warg was still forgotten..." She brushed her hair away from her face and clambered laborously upward. "That male elf did have a nice voice, though..." Laurel giggled. "I'd better get straight to work when we get back up! Sir Grondy'll have my head!"
"YOU CALLED GRONDY SIR!!" said the dwarf. "Means he's a knight." and she swayed. "WARG WINGS!!!! BALROG MEAT!!!! BEER!!! Now." and she staggered over to the counter. (She means warg meat and balrog wings.)

OOC: It's my 1400th post!!! Man, I'm OLD!!!! I feel special. Nothing on Grondy. When did YOU join, Grondy?
i guess it helps to take voice lessons in real life...

hey Grondy have you found someone yet to pick up the things on the things needed list?
"What kind of soup did you have in mind, Mr. Grondy? I don't think they want barley beef soup with sundry vegetables again so soon- or is it soon? Anyway, what do you want? And you might want to take up Calin on that offer to get stuff- I'm not even sure I can make soup, as I haven't seen the state of the pantries lately."
"This is quite the route you're taking me on, Laurel. How in the world did you find it?" Eruwen made her way up the tunnel fairly easily, lightly tredding through the dirt and debris so that she didn't brush any back on Laurel. However, she still found it quite the trek compared to the quick drop of the dumbwaiter shaft. It was Claw who was causing all of the trouble, getting under her hands and feet, brushing dust into her face.

"Ya know, I thought it would be better to get a group together to get the goods down there. There's quite a bit of stuff. It sounds like the other pathway has been opened now, so perhaps we can start to actually use the stairs for what they were intended."

They came out the top of the path and Eruwen looked at the room. "Seriously, Laurel. How in the world did you find this?" Eruwen looked down at the dirt on her hands, "Ah darn. Would you look at that? I broke a nail."
"And Calin, here's your tankard of Gimli's Finest, as well as some fresh Watcher Rings. If you would really like to go grocery shopping for the K-Dumish Inn, then I better talk to Eva about anything she needs added to my list, so as to bring the larder's stock back up to snuff."

"When you've finished your snack Calin and are ready to go, come see me and I'll give you the list and send the House Troll along with you, for to guard the gold and do the heavy packing."

"Yo Eva, hows about some creamy cheesey cauliflower and brocolli soup? Else some good old fashioned Fangornian onion soup? Or Maybe even both? And here is the grocery list, please add to it anything you think we'll need in the next week or so. Calin has offered to do the Inn's shopping."

"Here's you some taters and venison Valin, plus a wad of Old Toby fer your pipe." continues Grondy as he also topped off Valin's tankard. "Oh, and Gimli's Finest is ale, not beer. Beer is what we serve the drunks, namely Loni now she can no longer tell the difference."
"Better to break a nail than your arm, I'd wager. And don't ask how I found the tunnel...it sort of wasn't there until recently..." Laurel trailed off, then told Eruwen that she was glad she found a back way into the cellars. "Just in case, you know? Now, if you'll excuse me, I haven't been the best barmaid of late, and poor Eva has her hands full. Ah. Here's the hallway where you bumped your head! How is that bump anyway? Well, I'll bring you a tankard as soon as I get something cooking. See you out there!" With that she scuddled off, grabbing her apron from her room and heading downstairs into the bar area, still covered in dirt from the climb up from the tunnel.
I will take the list once eva has taken care of her listing and then leave with it and the troll. after that who knows how long i will be gone... but the inn will return to normal hopefully.
"Hmm... the list looks good, except it needs the addition of onions..." Eva quickly scribbles down onions at the bottom of the list. "Here, Calin, I think that's all we need. We don't have enough onions right now for the Fangorian stuff, Mr. Grondy, but I can whip up a pot of the creamy cheesey cauliflower and brocolli soup right away." With that she heads for the kitchen, wondering vaguely how long it would take Laurel and Eruwen to come up the back way and where they would come out.
"The tunnel wasn't around until recently?" Eruwen questioned Laurel. "Interesting." She eyed Laurel curiously wondering to herself how she really knew about the tunnel.

As they started to walk back to the main room, Eruwen almost hit her head on the beam in the hallway once again. "Oh sheesh, thanks for the warning," she said lowering her head, just missing the wooden obstruction. "I could have been knocked out again. Not good."

They reached the main room, and Eruwen sat down at one of the tables. "Heya Grondy. Could I get some food and drink please? Perhaps it can be taken off my payment for finding the source of that terrible moaning," she said as she lifted Claw onto her lap and started stroking him. "By the way, you may want to send some strapping men down there to get some of that aged wine and brandy. It's excellent!" she said with a slight hiccup.

OOC: This is going to be my last post until sometime in May. Take care everyone! Talk to you again soon.
Bye Eruwen cant wait for you to get back... and Grondy what happened to your jumpsuits and elvis impersinations...I could always pick up more if you need them.
OOC: When I took up running the Inn for Gimli, I found I no longer had to sing for my supper and my middle grew too large for the suit, the sequins tarnished, and I wasn't very good at it. Elk Grinning Smilie

"Okay," says Grondy to the House Troll, "You go along with Calin, she has the list for the groceries; here is a bag of gold to pay for them, don't use it for anything else, or let any one make off with it. You are to carry the groceries back here. And most importantly keep Calin out of trouble." "Calin, it's not that I don't trust you, it's just that we need those groceries so we can eat this next week."
"CAN I COME TOO?" shouted the dwarf, whose voice was breaking. (Hey, we can have beards, why can't we have breaking voices too? Equality!! And in return you dudes have permission to get pregnant.) "CAN I CAN I CAN I?" And everyone groaned because they knew she only wanted to go so she could drink all the booze before it reached the inn.
You can come only no drinking. And grondy I am a HE. I am not offended but for future reference.
well... were off
As Cali, the House Troll, Loni and Robbin leave the Inn

A tall fair headed elf named Windrush tiptoes in through
the door. "All Hail and Well Met, I am Windrush and I come to
taste the good beer and fine food that this house has to offer..

I am aware of the custom for a new comer to sing a song, but unfortunately
my larynx took a thrashing with a terrible cold last week and I have been
rubbing my throat with a leaf from a mallorn tree to aid in it's recovery. I will however
tell a jape...

Paddy (a threadbare hobbit) went down to the market one fine morning and spied himself
a shiny silver thermos flask. On asking the vendor of the stall what it was, the vendor replied that
a thermos flask kept things hot when needed and also kept things cold when needed ! Paddy then proceeded to ask the vendor how much he could purchase it for ? The vendor being a shrewd old Hobbit from over the Brandywine Bridge told him that he would sell it for 5 pieces of silver... the deal was done.

The following morning Paddy was crossing the bridge at Bywater when he spied his friend Murphy (A hobbit of dubious quality)... "The top o'th morning to you my friend Paddy" said Murphy "what shiny thing do you have under your arm there"? Paddy replied "A thermos flask", "well what does a thermos flask do when it's at home"? asked Murphy, Paddy replied "it keeps things hot if you want to keep them hot, or cold if you want to keep them cold" !!! "so what do you have in there at the moment"? asks Murphy

Paddy replies, "I have two cups of hot broth and two chocolate ice creams" Big Laugh Smilie Very Big Grin Smilie

With that out of the way Windrush moves off to the bar to have himself a large tankard of beer and dodge any missiles from an unforgiving audience as he has told yet another of his useless jokes
just to let you know I am calin and I will be back tommorow with loni and troll.
no problem both of you
OOC: Sorry about the mixup Calin/Robbin/'wood.

"That was a rather silly story Windrush, but it meets the requirement. Here's your tankard of Gimli's Finest and a plate of deep fat fried Spicy Balrog Wings."
you're right it is rather silly and it sounds much better than you can right it down

I also apologise (being new) for the mixup in identities Dunce Smilie
Laurel made her way back to the kitchen and found a large pot of steamy, cheesy soup of some sort on to boil. Eva evidently had been busy while Laurel had been galavanting around the inn like a drunken schoolgirl, "rescuing" someone who didn't need rescuing. She felt the old familiar twinge of guilt; poor Eva. She got to work preparing what faire she could out of the limited stock, and set about taking drink orders from the patrons. A new face was among the crowd, a male elf with striking features. He looked somehow familiar to her, but she had not spent much time among elves and doubted she knew him. "Hello, Sir, I am the barmaid. Great story you had there, though I don't think I'd want a taste o' that! May I get you a drink of some kind?"(Mind you, she was still covered head-to-toe with tunnel-dirt and sweat) She stepped back so as not to offend the stranger with her stench, which had now reached her own nose. "Maybe the good house ale?" Seeing his full tankard in his hand, she said, "Ah. Got some, then. Right, well, if you need more, I'll be back in a few minutes." With that, Laurel returned to the kitchen and brought out the food. She served Loni first, seeing that she needed it to sop up the liquor most. Big Laugh Smilie
"Whoa there Laurel, that bump on the head must still be bothering you, else Loni has a doubleganger, for she went with Calin and the House Troll to fetch the supplies to restock the larder. Maybe you should go have a shower and a lie-down before getting back to work, I can cover for a couple more hours. It'll be no problem; besides, the aroma, which I don't think we can blame entirely on the cauliflower, is a little off-putting," Grondy added with a grin.
Calin steps in with the hose troll towards the end. and replies to Grondy... No it is Loni. We sent her ahead before the last part getting the ale or else we would have to get more. so she arrived before us. Here they are and we came back with more than we started with. some guy thoght of pick pocketing us and so i caught him and the gaurds took him away because he was wanted and I figured he didn't need his money anymore. but may I have an ale now?
"Laurelindhe ilmarin", Another beer if you would, said Windrush ... but alass it is too late, she has
adjourned to an outer chamber to remove the tunnel dirt from her skirt and done as Grondmaster
bidded adding more perfume to her neck and face to further enhance her demeanour...

"Some food, perhaps roasted chestnuts or some pumpkin pie? Is there anyone who can placate
an elf's empty stomach after such a long journey from the wilderlands?"

He strides over to a table and sits down - not sure if it is self service or a comely serving maid who takes the order Elf Confused Smilie
Rue quickly made her way inside trying to avoid any commotion, not being the singing type but knowing the protocol, she began to sing her song:

Magic lives inside my soul
Flowing through my viens
It penatrates my heart and mind
Causing sun when there is rain

One half of me was missing
And now it has been found
Dark and light caused corruption
But of late, become sound

Soon the day will come
When parts become divided
And on that day, neither half will loose
But one will be confided

Once again dark poetry has replaced light.
"Oops my mistake then, so it was Loni after all. Here's your ale and a thank you for your help Calin," and he points the Troll towards the kitchen and sets him to work stowing the newly purchased groceries in their proper places.

He grabs a plate cuts a piece of pumkin pie, adds a couple roasted chestnuts as garnish as well as a swirl of whipped cream and a dark chocolate shaving, and returns to the bar where he hustles over to Windrush's table. "Here you go my friend," and places the pie before the hungry elf.

Then he returns behind the bar and draws a a tankard of Gimli's Finest and a pitcher of beer; the forner he presents to Rue Auburn smiling, "For your dark song."

He returns to Windrush's table and bending over, whispers so none of the other patrons could hear him and trying to lessen any embarasment, ("Master Windrush Sir, I only say this just in case you hadn't yet heard: it isn't considered polite RPG etiquette to move someone else's character or even to put words in their mouth. You may suggest or request that they do something, but only they get to do the actual doing of it, don't you see" and he continues with a friendly smile, "then all we others get to do the reacting to it if we've a mind to do so.")

Grondy then tops-off Windrush's tankard from the pitcher and places the pitcher of beer beside the elf and says with wink, "Just in case you run dry afore we can get back to you. If you wants something more to eat, just yell. I'm off to get me a bowl of that hot creamy, cheesy broccolli and cauliflower soup and some toasted garlic bread, but if you needs anything just you give a yell and somebody will be back in a couple jiffys." And with that Grondy scurried back to the kitchen,
"Thank you", She said, accepting it. Rue quickly took a sip and began moving to a secluded table, taking out a book as she drank.
Laurel quickly bathed, changed wench dresses, and tied her hair back away from her face. It would be a busy night, indeed. As she made her rounds again in the bar, she noticed that the ale she had left Loni was-gasp-still there! Then she felt a little silly, as she remembered that Loni had gone on the quest to get supplies. (Oops, sorry Grondy) The dwarf just brought so much life to the inn, she mused breifly, then set about clearing plates and bringing back full ones to those whose apetite required sustenance. Then, inspiration hit. Laurel rushed to her employer's side and in a frenzied blur of mumbles told Grondmaster of the idea she had of holding a singing or joke contest among the inn's patrons. "Well, Sir, we do have a lot of guests to entertain..."
Grondy scratches his head, thinks a while, scratches some more, decides he too needs a bath and that Laurel's brainstorm has major possibilities. "Should we just make it a song or joke in general or how about if we do this around a theme such as 'The song or joke an old Orc warrior would sing or tell upon his retirement for the Dark Lords or Sarumans's service.'

Making it theme specific will keep our clientele from just mumbling the words to some current tune on their Eye-Box playlist or repeat the joke from this week's Cartalk or the current edition of Readers Digest. Least that is my take on it. What do the rest of you think?"

May your beard grow ever longer, may the twinkle never leave your eyes
and your toes always find a nice fire to warm themselves by Smile Smilie
An absolutely splendid Idea, Grondy as long as the newbies don't have to go first Big Smile Smilie I promise not to tell anymore silly stories
Eva had been listening to the conversation, having heard it as she walked by to refill someone's soup bowl. "I think it's a great idea! But that topic seems a bit narrow, Grondy... Maybe we could sing songs about the Inn!"
Calis looks up from his mug. Singing songs about the inn... Sounds like a gret idea. I'll see what I can put together... tell me if there is any change.
"Okay Eva" here we go:


Post your entries in character below and sometime early in May we'll pick the best ones. First prize will be at the least a week's supply of Gimli's Finest.

One that springs to mind and which won't count in the contest, was written by Professor Tolkien and published in The Fellowship of the Ring as well as The Adventures of Tom Bombadil and The Tolkien Reader. It starts out:

There is an inn, a merry old inn
beneath an old grey hill,
And there they brew a beer so brown
That the Man in the Moon himself came down
one night to drink his fill.


And after all that, Grondy draws himself a tankard of Gimli's Finest to sooth his throat from all that shouting.
The doors of the inn open, everyone goes quiet, the music stops. A woman walks in quietly, she has long brown hair and blue piercing eyes, the bow slung over her shoulder is hand carved and on a belt hanging at her side is quiver is full of arrows.
Elvish script is tattood along one of her arms.

She says, ďMy names is Maydmarion, Iím new to this area, please may I join you all for a drink and a chat. I heard the laughter from outside, it sounded nice.

Everyone starts talking and drinking, the band starts playing again...
Grondy bustles up to to the tattooed lady, "Welcome, welcome! You remind me of a song my nuncle Ned used to sing. Speaking of which, please read and comply with the sign" he says smiling, and points to the one hanging over the bar in the first post of this thread. He wipes down her table and continues with, "Everyone has to do this for their first drink; even I had to do it." And he goes off humming the tune of Tra La La Boom Di-ay while thinking "My uncle Ned was there, he came to gape and stare ..."
Oh.. well.. let me see, Maydmarion puts down her bow and unclasps her quiver and states

"This is for my lost love...."

Maydmarion starts to singing in a soft, sad voice, the rest of the patrons look up expectantly....

When I hear you laugh
When we share a secret
When your eyes sparkle
When weíre just us.

When we donít have to talk
When I watch you sleeping
When you remember
When I donít have to explain.

When you walk into the room
When we are in a crowd
When Iím by myself
When you make me giggle.

When I hear your heart beat
When you reach for me
Even when youíre not looking
Thatís when I love you.

Gimili asks what the drink will be, discretely wiping a tear from his eye. Maydmarion replies a single malt whisky if you have one - I need it to warm up and to forget...
"That was a mighty fine lament Maydmarion, which did bring a tear or two to both mine eyes. Gimli hasn't been around for a while, I'm filling in for him. (OOC: So you mustn't put tears in his eyes or words in his or any other player's character's mouth, saving your own, for we are a RPG).

Anyway here's your double-malt whiskey," said Grondy as he set it before the bow-woman. "If you'd like a tankard of Gimli's Finest Ale its on the house for your song; and would you be wanting a plate of Watcher Rings or Spicy Balrog Wings to snack upon whilst you have your drink?"
A fine lament Maydmarion "Bravo" I take my hat off to you

Windrush stands up from the table and bows low then sits down

again as he has consumed a little too much of Grondy's fine ale

and a Balrog's talon has stuck in his tooth
Just a thought for the day;

Our lager,
Which art in barrels,
Hallowed be thy drink.
Thy will be drunk, (I will be drunk),
At home as it is in the Khazad-dumish tavern.
Give us this day our foamy head,
And forgive us our spillage,
As we forgive those who spill against us.
And lead us not into incarceration,
But deliver us from hangovers.
For thine is the beer, the bitter, and the lager.

Hic !!! Winking Smilie

Maydmarion sends her sorries for putting words in Gimli's mouth. Very Sad Smilie (After I read your bit I recall reading a bit about speaking for another person - please let me know if I err again Wink Smilie )

Anyway, the Ale sounds really good, I need a good pick-me-up, and the Spicy Balrog Wings could hit the spot, I've been on berries and leaves for the past week or so.

Looking forward to meeting the locals.

oohhhh I've just hit my 300 post Wiggle Smilie
"Here you go Maydmarion a hot plate of Spicy Balrog Wings and a some Gimli's Finest to help wash it down and to put out the fire. If it still seems too hot, I've got a bottle of milkweed juice that is guaranteed to take your mind off the hotness, though the remedy may be worse than the cause."

"Nice song Windrush; is its title 'The Landlord's Prayer'" says Grondy with a grin? "You probably need a refill after that: the same or would you like to switch?"
it certainly is the Landlords Prayer and maybe a switch would
help me stay awake for another hour or so
thank you
Eva stands up on the stage. "Well, Windrush seems to have started the contest... I have a song that I wrote when I first came here about the Khazad-Dumish, and it seems appropriate for this contest, so..."
Eva begins to sing to accompaniment that, strangely enough, doesn't seem to have a source.

The Khazad-dumish Inn Song by Eva lilith

"My first is the last in back and in Took
And part of the difference twixt left and forsook.
My next is the first of both haddock and hook,
My third is but one ere the first thatís in book.
My fourthís at the end, the last of them all,
The fifth is the third, for those that recall.
For the sixth and the seventh, the same letter call,
Starting dizzy and drunk, this oneís not hard at all!
For the eighth, hereís an answer, and not just a clue:
When youíre all by yourself, thereís no one but you.
Next is a letter that lets movers move;
Though they donít meow or mumble, youíll find it there, too!
I am the tenth letter- donít look for me!
I canít be seen, for an Iís how you see.
My eleventh is neither in foul nor in free,
Gollum uses this one a lot, youíll agree.
My twelfth is its own self divided by six,
My thirteenth the tenth one thrown into the mix.
My last are both second when youíre ďin a fixĒ
And at the ďnĒd of where I get my kicks.
When you solve this riddle, youíll have in your hand
The name of the inn that will never be bland.
So if you walk alone or roam in a band
Make your way to this tavern, the best in the land!"

Eva takes a quick bow and hurries off the stage to applause from those patrons sober enough to appreciate her song.
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