Thread: The Khazad-dumish Inn.. Please watch your head coming through the door.
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Eruheran leans towards the small shard that snapped off, picking it up and shows it to Eve.
Not big enough to be fatal. It was lucky we hadn't begun the meal, or, because of where it landed, at least 2 or 3 people would be dead. Thorin, *Winces* would you like to try Chásorian wine?
The Ranger finished his wine and leant back.
Eruheran leant up, reaching for his wine. He picks it up, and begins to pour it, when he realises it is empty.
We are out of Wine.... How many glasses have you all had?!
Eruheran Glares around the room angrily. He reaches for his sword before wincing,
I Will charge this inn for every single glass you have had! That stuff is expensive enough to run you *Winces* out of business!
Eruheran lies back down, angry, and pulls his hat off, placing it on his table. (He got it for 200 Quid in Chásor)
OOC: Am I the only one expecting Ar-Edain to come running out of a cupboard and chop my arm off because he it got infected by the ring and is turning me evil or something like that?
Soz 4 bad grammar & spelling & stuff, I'm on my DSi, no spell check :s
Eruheran turns around, wincing.
Because of my position and bad stomach, I cannot see him. *Wince* About that Wine; Will you... 'Donate' the money to me, so I can buy a months supply for the Inn. For every... 7 Gold, Silver or Mithrill peices you donate, *Winces* you get a slice of the finest Chàsorian cheese, from my cow.
Eruheran Points towards the stables, and then reaches for his bag. He pulls out a paper bag, and the room is flooded by the beautiful smell of the cheese.
Try some. but; 1 PEICE EACH!!, if you don't like it (weirdo), try a Bry Berry.
Eruheran pulls out a second paper bag, placing it in his hat.
'I'll have some, if no one else will,' said Fornad, rising and walking to the cheeseboard that Eruheran had laid out. He pulled out a sharp dagger from his side, cut a slice, then came back to his chair with it in hand. 'I'll make do with no crackers.'
He took a bite. It had a deep, mature flavour, like cheddar.
After savouring it for a moment, he turned and went to the window.
'The storm shows no sign of letting up tonight,' he said, watching the dark, muddy road and swaying oaks and birches outside the inn. 'Tis' a desperate traveller who goes out on a night like this.'
OOC: Has anyone ever given a thought to where the Inn might be located in ME? Near the Shire somwhere?
Eruheran stares at Fornac angrily,
I Expect my donation now! And I have not fed my Cow or Horse since the incident. Please may I have 2 of the Finest Steaks you have.
'I wouldn't think giving a horse and cow steaks to be a good idea; especially considering that in the case of the cow it would be cannibalism,' he said. 'Or did I get your demand wrong and you wanted those steaks for yourself?'
He paused for a few moments, then remembered what Eruheran had said about pay.
'Oh, sorry,' he said, hoisting his pack from the floor and digging around inside it for some loose change. He found a few mithril pieces and tossed them to the Chasorian. 'I've been half-beggared by that change to a Dunedain.'
Eruheran slices off 20% of the large block of cheese, putting it in a seperate bag, along with 2 Bry Berries. He counts the Mithrill peices, and works out it is enough for 1/3 of a bottle, which wouldn't have lasted 10 minutes in the inn.
I need enough donations for a weeks worth of this stuff! And it is for the animals, and my Cows love steak. *Winces* Before you ask, I took the long way to get here, When I got to Mordor, I went east until I reached the sea, and headed north, crossing the Sea of Rhún, and the Iron Hills, and avoided all *Winces* Dodgy conversations with Historians and Bards.
Joe the Bard, who everyone has forgotten about, climbs out of a unseen bit of roof rubble in the corner, and storms out of the inn, annoyed at Eruheran's comment about Bards.
T'is yar fr'nd? He' a bit... soft. I am Ebrond, ex'led elf from ri'dell.
He pulls down his hood, examining the inn, before seeing Ereherun asleep, and Icefang holding her forehead.
T'is seems to be... a dodgy 'un. That bloke seems rich, and he gets 2 chairs and a blanket, that l'ssie has a injured forehead, and FOR PETES SAKE! EXPLAIN THE COW IN THE STABLES!
Did I mention, I work as a insp'tor from the 'surance company?
Ebrond drops Joe, and pushes him onto a seat.
The scream; this young 'un. "The Nazgel! 'scream' Help!", he said. Do you limit the... you obviously don't.
Ebrond picks up the 2 Empty glasses of Chasorien wine, grinning.
Your statue colapsed because you built it in a drunk'n state, so you do not qualify for our 'ney, and we will reconsider keeping you as clients!
The Owner...? What company do you work for?! If you are treating one of the best drinks from the south like that, and they are obviously popular up here in the north too, especially now one extra bottle was finished without me realising, *Winces* Who do you think you are? We claimed the Insurance money because the roof collapsed on us, explaining the state of the inn. Also, sing a song or something or we have to kick you. You have spent too long without the proper entrance.
Eruheran points towards the bar,
We claim 3000 Mithrill in Damage. Grondy is away, and even though we have staff, I will represent us until we get that money!
Eruheran slams his fist on the table, then winces. His stomach had recovered, but his leg was still shattered. There was another flash of lightning.
How long will this storm last? And, If you continue threatening our inn, we shall tie you to a large metal pole and leave you for the storm to decide your fate!
There was another bolt of lightning, hitting a nearby tree, setting it alight.
Do you still want to report us as dodgy to your company, and complain about us to the Council of Inns? Do you know who I am? I have contacts!
Ebrond reaches for his sword, and swirls it, walking towards Ereherun.
Threaten me again and I will deal with you person'ly.
Ebrond stops swirling his sword, and slices off 1/3 of the cheese, before throwing the other 2/3 into the fire. He pockets the remaining lump and points his sword at Ererherun
Ereh'un, yar a fraud!!
'Gentlemen, gentlemen! Put away your swords!' he cried. 'There is no need for this sort of behaviour in a place whose rafters still echo with the sound of laughter and song.'
The Dunedain turned to Ebrond.
'Did you not see the sign over the bar?' he said, pointing to a now much battered and scratched notice. 'All first-time entrants must sing a song! So sing, before I have to throw you out. Old Grondmaster, from what I hear of him, would not be best pleased with the way you have acted.'
Eruheran winces, before noticing the cheese.
Do you think ruining my cheese was provoking me? I have a cow in the stables... FORNAC! GIVE THE COW AND HORSE SOME FOOD ALREADY!
Eruheran sits up, realising he hadn't fed the animals since his arrival, and the fact his Steaks had burnt.
Ebrond pulls out his sword and runs into the kitchen. There was a scream, and he returned with an entire pig. He walked out of the inn, reterning half an hour later with a large scar and his Marun clothes and black cloak covered in mud.
Yar, they be fed.
'Ebrond! You've been here a near-hour already! Sing!'
He sipped at another glass of Chasorian wine that he had filled and paid Eruheran for a few minutes before.
We have enough money for a fortnights worth of Chásorian wine. And Ebrond, what I said about the lightning pole still stands. You have 10 minutes, or you will be left for the Gods. If the storm clears... my horse is well trained.
Ebrond walked out, slamming the door
He's getting the Bailiffs... Fornac, Thorin, Sian, Icefangs, Eva, Ar-Edain, Whoever else I've missed, we need to fortify the inn. They sound violent...
Eruheran grabbed his sword, and climb off his 'bed', wincing. He walked to the window, using the sword as a walking stick, and watched the cloaked inspector walk through the rain.
This rain must end soon, but it may delay them. I will signal for a group of my personal guards, waiting in a nearby city, to come and assist.
Wincing, Eruheran walked upstairs, and returned 20 minutes later after writing a letter and sending it with one of the Inns messenger pigeons.
They shall be here by Friday.
'I don't think he ever read that notice,' he said. 'And now he's threatening to attack! This place really does go insane without Grondy. Though you were right, Eruheran, to call for guards to protect the inn. I saw the grave of the guard troll some way down the road, so we're completely vulnerable.'
Eruheran waits a second, before limping over to the fireplace, and picking up a large log from next to the fire. It was the right size.
We need to evacuate the animals...
All first-time visitors MUST sing a song.
'The very words of Gimli_axe_wielder,' he said in a level tone of voice. 'The stranger had completely disregarded this. I simply made it clear to him that he had to sing, nothing else.'
OOC: I've got an avatar! Woo hoooo!!!!
"Once you're done you will get a pint of Gimli's Finest (TM) and some snacks free."
Since Sian hasn't been here for a couple of days I'll be the Inn keeper in the meanwhile.
'The stranger has left, old friend,' he said. 'Has your ale cast a blurry veil over the world again?'
She looked around at Thorin and Icey, who she knew were old customers at the inn. "Does anyone know if there are ownership papers or some such? Considering the founder of the inn and the original regulars, I wouldn't be surprised if there are contractual provisions for this sort of thing. If nothing else, there might be a map of the cellars, and from what I remember, we could hold out down there for quite some time."
After a few puffs on his pipe, thinking about the slightly quirky air of the inn, he added:
'They don't have anything living down there, do they?'
Leaving Eva to ponder his question, he went to find the entrance of the cellars. Walking across the main room, passing by the door to the kitchen and gents and ladies bathrooms, he came into the entrance of a torch-lit corridor. He went in. Forbidding doors passed on either side, and as the corridor took a sharp left, he even saw one in the shape of a man, as though someone had run through the wall. Carved on the strange door were dwarven runes, and although he could not read them, below was something written on a sign in Westron. With a growing sense of fear, the Ranger crept closer. It read:
'AR-37 was here: He came, he saw, he crunched, he left.' (by Grondy, near-bottom page 17 of the Khazad-dumish Inn, on Ar-Edain's randomness).
He was confused for a moment, then laughed. Dwarves had a strange sense of humour.
He moved on. As he walked down the stone corridor, none of the doors seemed to look exciting enough to lead to deep underground cellars, but however as he came to the end of the corridor, he saw it. An arched, oaken door, its surface pitted and its wood blackened. Somehow, it seemed to look a lot older than the inn itself.
Fornad decided that now probably wasn't the best time to go exploring, and he quickly went back to the light and comfort of the main inn room.
OOC: I don't know why this post is in italics. I did not code it that way, and none of my edits are affecting it.
"I have to warn you against the cellar. Grondy's pet Spider is still lurking there. I had a lot of trouble with it when I had to change the doors of some of our guest rooms. Take care if you're going down there."
"And Eva, as for succession papers, I'm not very sure. I know that Gimli axe wielder committed keeping of the Inn to Grondy when he went away on his expedition but other than that I do not know."
"Grondy should be able to give you more info when he comes back. Oh! And I have some hot and crispy balrog's wings. Anyone want some?"
His eyes flicked over to the corridor entrance on the far side of the room.
'I saw the entrance of the cellars, Eva, but I didn't go in. Though I think that we should explore them at least a little way, before Captainduck returns. I also saw an old relic; something Ar-Edain must have done a few years ago. He ran through a wall, and from what I can see some dwarves built a man-shaped door around the hole.'
He drew on his pipe, waiting for the wings.
We are sending 25 Men across. We heard rumours from the Barad-Dúrish Inn, that some rich guy got near fatally injured, and the insurance company is reporting them to the council, and preparing a small gang of freelance "bailiffs". We shall get there as fast as we can, giving everyone a chance to recover and prepare.
He then walked over to the corridor, and went down it and to the left, again coming to the forbidding door that led to the cellars.
Waiting for Eruheran, he checked that his sword was loose in its sheath, then took his bow off his back and strung it.
We shouldn't go too far, he thought. Just enough to find a defensible place.
"So there may be a cat in here, and a spider. Any other possible threats?" Eruheran asked, hobbling down the stairs.
"OOH! Eva! Yes yes, my head bump did in fact screw with my 'ead..." Ice exclaims with a sideways smile. She wraps the woman in a hug and cringes, "Oooh..." she murmurs slightly.
"In case anyone was wondering what happened to my head...some time ago, I gained the ability to teleport, and while I pretty good at it, when I've had too much to drunk, I just teleport around accidently..." she sighs and blushes. "Anyway, from what I've figured out so far, I teleported upstairs to my old room...and, well that was my intention...and I ended up in midair, upside down...and smashed into the floor...with my face" she cracked my smile. "I'm lucky all I hurt was my head," she added.
Having been standing quietly the entire time the "inspector" and the other were arguing, she stared with raised eyebrows until the fighting ceased.
"Animals...? Oh dear! Where's my cat!?" Ice exclaimed when Eva mentioned animals. She disappeared without a sound, and reappeared outside the Inn's windows, and commenced to running around the place, screaming, "CAT?! Oi! CAAAAAT???!!!"
Fornad heard some commotion from back in the main inn, but decided to ignore it and to follow the hobbling Chasorian. Just before he went down the spiral staircase, he lifted a torch from its bracket and held it out in front of him, illuminating the ancient stones.
'I get the impression that Thorin meant something more than a normal spider,' he said as he came behind Eruheran, their steps echoing, 'when he said Spider. Though we should be able to hold anything off so long as it's not Shelob.'
Running to the cellar doorway, he cried down to Fornac and Eruheran:
"Did I mention that it was a rather big spider there? If not take care! And I also recommend you take a rope with you so that you do not get lost in there."
Feeling like a grasshopper he ran to the Inn's Door:
"Icefang, your cat is not outside. It is somewhere down the Cellar."
"Lets make a sign that we were here." Eruheran muttered grinning, passing Fornac the scimitar and pulling out his carving knife.
Aragorn is Smelly; Eruheran of Chásor.
He carved, with a odd grin on his face. Fornac looked at him, confused, and they entered the first door they found. It was a storage room, and a large wine cellar.
"Fornac, what is this?" He muttered, picking up a large object. "Its an egg?!" He muttered, looking at it. "Shall we keep it, destroy it or leave it, it may be a threat." Eruheran finished, pointing his scimitar at the egg.
"Did I mention that it was a rather big spider there? If not take care! And I also recommend you take a rope with you so that you do not get lost in there." A voice shouted from down the corridor. Eruheran groaned, hobbling back to the entrance.
I know who Shelob is btw, just Eruheran has spent the last few millennia as a weirdo in a cloak. And the Torch in my scimitar slides out. And Thorin, you double posted.
'Here's something to puzzle over,' he said, placing the egg in front of Icefangs. 'If it hatches, just shout, or scream, depending.'
He went to his bag dumped in the corner, and pulled a coil of rope out. Running back to the entrance of the corridor, he had a quick second thought, ran into the kitchen, grabbed a few balrog wings and popped one into his mouth. He went back through the corridor, down the stairs, and offered the other one to Eruheran.
'A bit of nourishment before we go deeper,' he said.
"What would be in the Egg?" Eruheran muttered, continuing down the corridor. He stubbed his toe on his bad leg, the shock causing him to drop his stick and fall, wincing. He reached for the object, and grabbed his torch. It was a skull of some animal, he couldn't work out what.
"Fornac, *Winces* Theres a skull on the floor, I'm hurt, but I can last." Eruheran winced, finding his scimitar and walking stick, passing Fornac the skull.
"Why is there a skull in the cellar of this inn?" Eruheran muttered, continuing. They found a door, and he kicked it open.
He followed the limping Chasorian into the room. Their flickering orange lights illuminated its ancient stones.
'By Sauron's Morningstar...' breathed Fornad.
The room was huge and cathedral-like, massive arches curving overhead and tall marble columns marching down to the end at either side. Broken wooden furniture lay scattered across the stone floor, grey with dust. But the most striking, and most awful thing about it were the thick, rope-like cobwebs tangled everywhere, in between the arches, hanging to the ground, creating an impenetrable nightmare.
A clutch of very familiar-looking white eggs were tied in a sticky bundle to the ceiling.
'Now we know where that egg came from!' hissed Fornad, not wanting to stir anything in the shadows above. 'Let's go!'
The Ranger ran back into the dark tunnel, heading for the stairs a few hundred metres back.
"Fornac, the rooms are separate, aren't they?" Eruheran asked, as Fornac slammed the door to the cellar.
"Ice! You shouldn't run around with a bump like that! Selen's a big kitty, she can take care of herself!" Eva seemed unsure which way to run, as she was somewhat nervous about the two impetuous guests going into the cellars by themselves as well. After a pause, she darted after Ice. "Come back in and get some, ha, ice for your head," she called. "We can leave a bowl of milk out, and I'm sure that'll bring Selen running..."
He was cut short by a sudden crash, coming from behind the door, and then the sound of loud scratching. A high-pitched growl emanated from it.
'I hope that door is strong, because I really don't want to meet what's behind it,' he said after he had recovered from the shock. 'That fire won't spread. The rest of the cellars are stone, and obviously that thing can feed itself.'
He went back along the corridor and entered the main inn room once more, dousing the torch in the bucket of water usually reserved for waking drunks.
'The Chasorian,' Fornad said, pointing back along the passage, 'has made Grondy's pet very angry. The cellars are now more of a threat than a hiding-place now. We'd better hope that the bailiffs don't come.' He looked over to Icefangs. 'Oh, and that egg has a baby spider inside it. What should we do with it?'
Anyone want to join me in this endeavour?