both had father(figure)s who were under the spell of evil maias
I agree with everything, but Denethor was never under the spell of Sauron - if you mean that literally, that is. He was a rightful user of the Palantir, hence Sauron could not force him unlike Saruman.
Like Tolkien wrote in his Letters, Denethor was merely tainted by politics.
See also The Enigmatic Denethor
Furthermore, I also like to note that Theoden was not under the spell of Saruman as shown in the TTT movie. He was under the influence of the poison of a sycophant instead.
I doubt whether Eowyn was regarded by the Eorlingas the way Faramir was regarded as a lesser version of his brother by the ppl of Minas Tirith. It is different because any competition was never possible for Eowyn was a woman. That said though : Eowyn might have felt she was being left out of everything because she was a woman, it was not so :
'Behold! I go forth, and it seems like to be my last riding,' said Théoden. 'I have no child. Théodred my son is slain. I name Éomer my sister-son to be my heir. If neither of us return, then choose a new lord as you will. But to some one I must now entrust my people that I leave behind, to rule them in my place. Which of you will stay?'
No man spoke.
'Is there none whom you would name? In whom do my people trust?'
'In the House of Eorl,' answered Háma.
'But Éomer I cannot spare, nor would he stay,' said the king; 'and he is the last of that House.'
'I said not Éomer,' answered Háma. 'And he is not the last. There is Éowyn, daughter of Éomund, his sister. She is fearless and high-hearted. All love her. Let her be as lord to the Eorlingas, while we are gone.'
I always worry that down the road when she finally knew herself she might discover she loved him but as a friend and because she was noble and was used to doing her duty and just silently went on with things, careful to hide the truth from her devoted husband and children and friends etc. She was after all a mortal woman with all the flaws and strengths as any other woman.
Tolkien did write about this in his Letters; he wrote that it is possible to love two people at the same time -indeed, Eowyn was still 'indecisive' until Faramir openly told her he loved him (the cheek!)- but eventually she came to love him like a citizen loves his/her ruling King.
I am sure this excerpt has already be posted elsewhere.
Anyway, maybe Eowyn's 'indecision' or realizing whom she really loved was based on Tolkien and Edith? After all, Edith was originally betrothed to someone else before Tolkien swayed her.
At any rate, in the old days there were different rules for the nobility. Marriage was merely a way to seal political deals or ensure power. Eowyn would gladly be stolen by the most important man in Gondor safe one, instead of returning to the thatched barns of the House of Eorl, where brigands drink in the reek, their brats rolling on the floor amongst their dogs...
In the words of Duke Paulus Atreides : 'If you want to bring down your House, marry out of love!'.
Give up the Halfring, she-elf...