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Look what I found on the Tolkien sarcasm page!

The Truth about Tom Bombadil
From a rec.arts.books.tolkien posting dated 3 May 1996.
At last, the mystery of Tom Bombadil's identity has been solved.


Tom Bombadil and the Witch-king of Angmar are the same person.

1. We never hear of Tom at all during the whole of the First Age. The Nine Rings aren't forged until the Second Age. QED.

2. You never see the two of them together.

3. In the first part of Fellowship of the Ring, the Nazgul are sent to the Shire to look for the wandering Baggins. Interestingly, Tom says to Frodo at the dinner-table: "...I was waiting for you. We heard news of you, and learned that you were wandering... But Tom had an errand there, that he dared not hinder" (Fellowship p.137 hardback, emphasis mine: note the fear Tom has of his master, Sauron!).

4. In Tom's questioning of the Hobbits, JRRT notes that "there was a glint in his eyes when he heard of the Riders." (Fellowship p. 144) I think he was concerned that his double-life might have been noticed. Interestingly, Tom immediately changes the subject of conversation!
Furthermore, the One Ring had no effect on Tom - which seems consistent with Tolkien's observations about how the Nazgul would have handled the same priceless object (Letters of J.R.R. Tolkien, #246): "They were... in no way deceived as to the real lordship of the Ring."

5. It's also interesting to note that Tom could see Frodo clearly while Frodo was wearing the Ring (Fellowship p. 144 hardback) - just as the Witch-king could see Frodo clearly while he was wearing the Ring at Weathertop! (Fellowship p. 208 hardback)

6. Perhaps most damning, however, is the incident with the Barrow-wights (Fellowship pp. 151-155), where Tom - with nothing more than a few simple words (p. 154) - commands the Barrow-wight to leave. And it does, without argument. Why would the Wight be so completely under Tom's control? Because in his alternate guise as the Witch-king of Angmar, Tom ordered the Wight to inhabit the barrow in the first place! Turning to Return of the King, Appendix A, p. 321, "evil spirits out of Angmar... entered into the deserted mounds and dwelt there." Obviously the Witch-king was reponsible for sending the wights there; just as obviously, the Witch-king (disguised as Tom) would be capable of ordering them to leave!
(This is related to another passage, which has since been brought to my attention. On Fellowship page 158 hardback, Tom is guiding the Hobbits back towards the Road when he gazes towards the borders of Cardolan. "Tom said that it had once been the boundary of a kingdom, but a very long time ago. He seemed to remember something sad about it, and would not say much." Since Tom, as the Witch-king, was the one who destroyed the kingdom of Cardolan, it's little wonder that he wouldn't say much about his involvement. Perhaps his remembering "something sad" reveals some remorse at being the instrument of Cardolan's destruction...?)

...Yep: I think we have an airtight case here. Smile Smilie

...It's worth noting that, after the Witch-king was dead, Gandalf said he was "going to have a long talk with Bombadil" (Return of the King, p. 275). Curiously, he never tells anyone about the meeting later... and he's right there at the Grey Havens at the end of the book, undelayed it seems by long conversation. I think we can therefore theorize that Gandalf made it to the Old Forest, but that Tom (once the so-called "Witch-king" had died) was nowhere to be found!

...Of course, all this brings up the curiosity of motive. What would make the Witch-King of Angmar sport such a double identity? I suppose that the Witch-king, once of proud Numenorean ancestry, felt trapped by the guise of evil which Sauron had tricked him into, and in the fullness of time forged this alternate identity for himself so that he could occasionally feel happy, helpful, noble, and more at one with himself and his lineage. The situation is perhaps analagous to a crossdresser who, feeling trapped in a man's body, would occasionally assume the identity of a woman. It therefore makes sense that the Witch-king's other identity would be so peculiarly enigmatic, and perhaps sheds light on JRRT's observation in Letters #144: "And even in a mythical Age there must be some enigmas, as there always are. Tom Bombadil is one (intentionally)."

...Who else would be aware of Tom's double-life, I wonder? Since Tom repeatedly claims to have been around "before the river and the trees", and indeed even claims to be older than the Ents (Fellowship p. 142), surely the eldest of the Elves would know he was lying. Elrond plays along with Tom in public, being kind enough not to reveal his secret, but also seems to know that Tom and the Witch-king are one and the same; hence his refusal to give the Ring to Tom for safekeeping (Fellowship p. 278-9): "Power to defy the Enemy is not in him."

Bom the Witch-king! Wabwabwab!
This is both an atrocity and an insolent attempt to mar the good character of Tom Bombadil-but I like it! There are too many links between the two...but logically speaking, would the Witch-King have the ability to become good in any way, even if it was a guise? Sauron's corruption surely could not be cast aside so easily. And what of Sauron? He has the power to know what his servants are doing at all times, does he not? How could the W.K. possibly hope to deceive his master by aiding those who Sauron pursues? How, too, would the W.K. be able to get rid of the other Nazgul, who also were hunting the hobbits in the same general area? There are many more inconsistencies with this theory, but I will let some of the other more eloquent members speculate on it awhile.Smile Smilie

Even though I disagree with this theory, it is very funny-very similar to the Michael/La Toya Jackson quandry; are they one and the same? Only their bikini waxer knows for sure... Wary Smilie
Nice one Loni for bringing this one to our attention. I always knew there was something suspicious about Our Tom. The motive for the Witchking is obvious, though. What un-bloodied male wouldn't like to have a piece of Goldberry?
On the lines of funny stuff, here's two jokes I found on the web,

Sorry two all blondes reading this!

Strider was rescuing 10 blonde elves from moria (god knows why they were even down there) he threw a rope across a ditch he went first, soon the balrog was running behind them, screaming and ranting, they clambered as fast as they could, but the rope could only hold ten people at a time, and Strider being noble and brave cast himself off into the drafty abyss, and the ten blonde elves were so touched... they clapped. *cries for all blondes reading this * Very Sad Smilie

P.S sorry for my blatant misuse of the Psydonym 'Strider" to all Estel fans out there.

GANDALF:Looks mounrfully at pipe and small ammount of pipeweed *Mutters magic words under breath*... *Eyes widen* "oh CRAP I summoned the balrog!" *GLARES AT RANDOM HOBBIT* "Fool of a took!"
and the ten blonde elves were so touched... they clapped.

Instead of that punch line I'd add this one:

and the ten blonde elves were so touched... they held up placards all reading either eights, nines, or tens, except for one three from a Legolas fan who just knew he would have done it more gracefully.