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Thread: Gender differences

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I'm not sure, but I think this website has a fair mixture of girls and guys (possibly more guys though)

And it's terrible, but not one of my female friends is into Tolkien or any other fantasy for that matter... okay one of my friends watched TT with me a few times, but she's never read the book and I'm sure she only goes to drool over Legolas Shaking Head Smilie
I guess that's why most of my friends are guys.

The reactions I get from some people when I tell them I've seen TT 7 times at the cinema is awful - they look at me like I'm some kind of freak or something. Disturbed Smilie
Most of my male friends don't like historical murder mysteries written by female postAuthorIDs, but I do. Maybe we are just a bunch of non-conformists who have flocked together under the Tolkien umbrella where we can share that which we like and ignore our diferences.

The reactions I get from some people when I tell them I've seen TT 7 times at the cinema is awful - they look at me like I'm some kind of freak or something.
No comment! Elf With a Big Grin Smilie
The reactions I get from some people when I tell them I've seen TT 7 times at the cinema is awful - they look at me like I'm some kind of freak or something

Little advice: don't tell 'em. Orc Grinning Smilie

As to the initial question: I'm sure it's a fairly well proportioned mixture of girls and boys. The guys are around more often perhaps. Elf With a Big Grin Smilie
I think it's about 50:50 to be honest, the council is a ratio of 4:3 blokes to girls, but that's just coincidence, we didn't get picked for what sex we are. Plus nobody can ever tell who's a guy and who's a girl round here (cos there's all these girls called Tom Wink Smilie)
I think Plastic is correct. I think it is about 50/50 here.

My best friend Stacie is really into Fantasy and Tolkien. (She read it long before i ever did. She and matthew actually have more in common in that area than matthew and I do.) My other friends don't really care one way or the other. I take most of my fantasy recomendations from those 2.

I`d just like to say, I`m not into Sci-fi and all that rubbish stuff! But I love LOTR!! Big Laugh Smilie Strange isn`t it! Or maybe not? Cool Smilie
I agree that there are a pretty equal number of guys and girls on this site, though before coming here I knew only two girls who liked LotR (this meaning the book, all the girls I know love the movie). But it doesn't really matter to me, because I think that it is great to talk about Tolkien with everyone and anyone. Big Smile Smilie
Both me and one of my sisters always liked LOTR although I was the bigger enthusiast. More recently, I managed to get my oldest sis to read the book and she loved it.
I got my ex boyfriend into it and also my cousin who is male. He got his half sister into it though.

Can't think of anyone else right now.
I think Tolkien books are equally liked by both sexs, but I have seen more guy’s that are really into it(this website is an ecepcion of course, I talk about people surrounding me
), though my best friend is totally into Tolkiens books, unfortunable, now I’m in Germany and she’s not, and all the girls/women I’ve met here don’t even seem to know that LOTR-movies are based on a book, terrible I know.... Very Sad Smilie but seriously I’ve been asked recently if there’s a "fourth" part of LOTR......
none of my friends like lotr besides one shes just into legolas.
as for the question i think its about 50 50 also
im known to have violent mood swings around people when htey tell me lotr is boring or theyve seen the movies but not read the books or say the movies are boring when it obviously (these are my opinions and i really dont want to offend anyone so if i do,unless u are 1 of the people i describe, im very sry)would be without the books and i really get mad at women/girls who just like orlando bloom, he plays an elf and has about 30 lines , and elijah wood was,although a good actor and did a great job, just wasnt at all like i expected frodo to look like(hobbits are fat!)

at least one of u has to agree that without the books the movies are just weird!
My brother and sister and I are big Lord of the Ring lovers. Along with several of my closest friends (I`m lucky! Smile Smilie). I believe there are a few more female members (ones that post) now. Hehehe, which is fine by me. =)
May I add to your tally?I was a huge Tolkien (and Lewis)fan when I was in my early teens,then I got caught up in all the stupid rubbish of adolescence(I was stupid,not all teens are-sorry to anyone I offend!),and I fell away from what I loved most.Now that I am older and have a family of my own,I have found my way back to it(I'll admit it,partly thanks to the movies)and my passion has been rekindled.My husband thinks I am insane and obsessed(he himself isn't really passionate about much).I have tried to get him to read the books as he likes the movies,but he tells me that it's all "girl's stuff".I happen to believe that these books,as any of the fantasy genre,are for anyone with imagination.This site makes me feel like much less of an oddity!I love you people!
Don't read this post if you get bored easily!

I have been known to have violent mood swings around people who say lotr is boring

I know how you feel. I was at school with my printed out text of LEsson 5 of the Quenya course from in the library at lunchtime. Two girls were sitting opposite me on a couch. They asked me what it was. I told them. They asked me why I should learn boring, stupid gibberish that means absolutely nothing and no one else would speak it except me. So I came up with a calm answer, even though I felt like shouting at them that compared to Quenya, English is a mess, and that it meant something to ME and that some other people speak it as well, buit thats not the poihnt. They asked me if I liked that really boring book lotr. I asked them which part was boring. THey said all of it. I asked which was the most boring. They said all of it. I asked them to give me a part that was boring. THey said all of it. I changed the subject. THey changed it back, and said that if I was a Tolkien freak then quote the second line of page 291 for them. I told them I doubted anyone could do that. They laughed and went back to saying TLOTR was boring. (They also went on about how i was a complete an utter geek, that Tolkien was a lunatic, and that J.K.Rowling was much better than Tolkien as a writer (And as everything else) for added nastiness)You should've seen me then. I got kicked out of the library. They didn't, and as I left they were laughing.

But wait! I have the solution! Every time someone says nasty things about tlotr, just laugh to yourself and think: "Those silly idiots! If they think that, then they must have puny minds, and if they don't understand what good writing is, then they certainly are missing out, and good, because they are acting like real idiots, and they are too idiotic to notice!"
Okay, I know TONS of guys and gurls that are absoutly obsessed with LOTR!!! It is a crazy thing at my school!

P.S: i am a girl and I LOVE LOTR!!
I am a guy, LOTR is the only thing keeping me from being like all those morons insulting it (has any body that insults it read it that u know of?and back to my point if they judge by the movies they dont know anything about it,i watched the Fellowship(forgive me for watching a movie before i read the books)and almost fell asleep on my friends couch with my face literally in a bowl of popcorn,then after i read the book i got the special extended edition,which is alot longer,and watch it over and over without getting at all bored.
Yeah, for some reason, the girls tend to just watch the movies for "cute" actors (bleck!) Most of my friends are boys, because they like to watch the intense battle sequences like me. Also, they read the books. Most girls I've met say stuff like "Yeah, I made it to the Farewell Party...Isn't Orli Bloom AWESOME! I think he's going to propose to me even though I don't know him...*swoons*" In Love Smilie You get the picture. And hey, I don't think boys and girls who enjoy each other's company should get branded as boyfriend and girlfriend. Shaking Head Smilie

By the way, I have the same problem with "LOTR is Boring Smilie " People. They make me really mad, especially when they say HP is "sooo much better" I usually just say "Yes, Lotr is probably above your head. I still have my copy of "The Cat and the Hat" if you want to borrow it." That remark usually leaves a stunned face while their brain is trying to process my comments (kind of like the Hobbits at the Farwell party after Bilbo says "I don't know half of you half as well as I should like...") And I walk away before I do serious damage.

Angry Elf Smilie HOWEVER! Angry Elf Smilie
If I can't do that, or they counter me with something smart-alecy, I get VERY VIOLENT. I've been told (by a fellow fan) I have the rage of Feanor, and that's saying something. I've broken somebody's nose before because they insulted me deeply about LOTR (I shall not post what they said about it since this is a family site) And now that I've blathered about my rage, I shall shut up and let someone else say something usefull, unlike me.
I know how ALL of you feel!! I to used to get VERY angry when somebody said rubish about LOTR . Now i just know that im a better person thanks to LOTR because im difrent and i like it. I dont quite understand why so much of you dondt like the movies. I knew that they could never make it as good as it should be, but i love the movies. Its nice to see the stuff (at least some of it) from the books that i wonderd how they would look like on film. Of course ther are a lott of mistakes, but comon, give them a break. They really tried, and it is LOTR!!!! I first read the book when i was small , and i remember that i never wanted to read it because it looked boring. Finally after my mom convinced me i read it and LOVED IT!!!! Now i know more things about it than my mom will ever know, and im very thankfull for her making me read it.

Ther should be a place for people like us who love Tolkien, because we have something in common that we love, and the fact that we are from around the world only makes that clearer.
I wish ther were more true Toliken fans that i could really talk to, but i only have one friend that ,seems to me, is starting to lose intrest in it. That makes me sad but you cant make people love LOTR, it comes to you by it self. I even started making costumes out of LOTR for fun, that i can wear at least for the Carnival time. Now im working on a Haradrim one, after i made a Mines of Moria goblin suite.

I just want to say, never stop loving Tolkien and take no heed of the foul laughs of the unseeing people that have not seen the true light of LOTR. ( heheh a little bit of poetic rambling)
LOTR is rubbish, boring and dull.

Tolkien was a charlatan and stole all his ideas from Mrs Beasley of 49 Dullston Avenue, WarWarwickshire.

Its twoo, its twoo, 'onest, the goblins at the bottom of stairs told us.
Maybe we are just a bunch of non-conformists who have flocked together under the Tolkien umbrella where we can share that which we like and ignore our diferences.

I agree GRondy. My friend (sometimes) when I talk about PT he tells me that its a nerd hangout and starts saying how nerdy it is to study a book. Then he getts all angry about me not taking off the link to "the nerd hangout" on our website. Then I insulted his computer games.
I love LOTR too, but its the same thing, no one in my family likes it, so I get mad at my stepdad when he says it is stupid, but then I don't have any friend that like LOTR except for one. Some of my other friends just like Elijah Wood, and don't get me wrong, I think he is cute too, but they don't like the movies...oh well..that is their opinion.
Nobody I know likes LOTR except for like 4 of my friends. Well, there are people that like the movies but havent read the books and stuff. My best friend's brother is like me in the obsession catagory, though lol.
Like Adweena said
lot of girls just likeLOTR for Viggo the hobbits and Orlando.
I must be odd then lol, Im female but for me its all about the story and its characters especially in the books as you get so much more background and details

I agree with Sev... the time and imagination that tolkien must have had!! I couldn't imagine writing things that were so complex! and he wrote a whole world with its own history and cultures and EVERYTHING!!!(Viggo, Orli, and Dom are just the special extras!lol )
I couldn't imagine writing things that were so complex! and he wrote a whole world with its own history and cultures and EVERYTHING!!!
Of course if you studied hard and spent about forty year writing it, you too just might be able to come up with something which is "almost, but not quite, entirely unlike" Tolkien's epic. (I love that wording by Douglas Adams.)
I never thought of LotR as fantasy in the same way as the Fantasy Genre so never thought it was a 'male' domain in the way that fantasy and fantasy role playing is often seen as 'male'. I think fewer women are as serious about the whole fantasy genre than men. I love SF, which is apparently odd - not to say that women don't enjoy SF but it is male dominated. I role play about once a month with a bunch of guys, all of whom take it far more seriously than I do. All this building up characters and stuff..... I'm just there to kick *rse and eat the Doritos.

Lord of The Rings seems to bridge the gap - I think as many woman enjoy it as men and I am talking about the books, not the oooooohing after Aragorn or Legolass in the films. I wouldn't consider someone who watches the films just for the eye candy to be a fan of anything except eye candy. However..... if they then read the books and discover the wonderful world of Tolkien they can join us in homage to the great man.

I saw this thread and I thought that I would jump in here. First of all if there are people out there that think that these books are boring or stupid or whatever that just shows that the intelligence level of the world in general is declining. I am one of those girls that does not get into the cheesy romance novels or those "chick novels" the last one of those that I read was The Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood that was a really good book though. I too do not really consider LoTR to be fantasy but maybe it is. I think that to compare JK Rowling to JRR Tolkein is like comparing apples to oranges. Harry Potter is one my favorite series of books, I think that she had a great idea and she ran with it and most important she got kids to read for that alone she needs to be commended. Who knows what she may have started a kid might read Harry Potter and realize that he / she likes to read and maybe the next book that kid picks up is the Hobbit and then look they have discovered a whole new world. As for people thinking that people are freaks that read Tolkien I say that they need to start reading something other than the entertainment page in the newspaper and get their heads out of their collective a**es. I always got that stuff too I was reading authors like Stephen King when I was in the 6th grade so you can imagine what people thought of me all the rest of the girls were reading Sweet Valley High and I was lugging around a copy of Christine. I think that people insult what they cannot or will not understand and to me that is sad. As far as the mix here in the short time that I have been on this board I think that the mix is pretty much 50/50.

I can't say if PT is 50/50 on the gender issue because half the time I am not aware of people's genders. But that is not what attractes me to this site. It is the diversity of people with a common intrest. It is great that we can just talk about how much we like these works of literature. I love being taken into worlds far away from my own, and to places very close to my own. Books really open these doors, and Lord of the Rings, and all other books associated with those, gave me a massive world to mentally explore. I think that is what hooks many Tolkien fans, is the fact that it just isn't a trilogy and then it ends. It is always happening, and the focus can be shifted to this race or that conflict. It can also be inspiring. Plus, I have always been a fantastical thinker, and elves, dragons, and mythical creatures have always been intresting to me.

So, I guess what I am trying to say is that here, it doesn't matter what others think of your... obsession, if you would call it that. It just matters that you love Tolkien's works as much as we do. Go Tolkien. Rock on, Forever.


P.S. Threads really evolve, don't they?
I think maybe it is tilted a little more to the male side.
Most of my friends that enjoy fantasy and sci-fi are guys. When my brother and I go to Warhammer 40K tournaments, there's maybe 5 girls including me, and 3 of them are tag-alongs to their boyfriends.
Maybe it's because women are more into reality and what is and can be proven, while men like the idea of chaos...
does anyone understand my rambling? and if so, do you mind making more sense of it than I am?
"I Think its completely Scandalous that woman were ever allowed to "read" the written word...

...if I had had my way, then we would have won this argument with a clear 100 per cent majority!"

Bad King Smilie
Was that a quote of someone else's? Sounds a bit discriminatory to me.... and maybe a little like heiracy. Big Smile Smilie I'm not very much into to Sci-Fi scene, so I haven't witnessed the gender split. Maybe Tolkien fans are more equal because there is something for everyone. Aragorn and Boromir for the ones intrested in burly manly men, and Arwen and Galadriel for the ones inclined to the females. And you have fighting for the violent types, male or female (hey, there are some pretty rough girls out there!). Romance for the lovers, peace for the hippies (go hippies) and magick (wizard magick) for those so inclined. So yeah, just a thought.

Musing C’no
ya maybe in the movies, but in the books there is very little romance, and Arwen is barely even mentioned in the book. The only real power head figure in the books who is female would be Galandriel, Ewoyn is a tomboy; i'll leave it at that.
Show those women a bit of respect and spell them right, Turin.

It's Galladhriel and Ewyoene.
That's not how they are spelled in English Virumor, but you knew that. Orc Grinning Smilie
I LOVE LOTR and Middle earth. Only 1 of my female friends has read the books and watched the films (oh I be a female by the way). Everyone thinks I'm mad. I'm told it's only for the boys - WHY Angry Elf Smilie I wouldn't dream of telling a male he couldn't cross stitch if he wanted to.

Question Smilie How many females belong to PT and how many males

I know the book is quite male orientated but I can still enjoy it even though I'm female. I enjoy archery I was an archer (before I hurt my back in a car accident) and pretty good at it, you can do anything you put your mind to male and female. Waving Hello Smilie

GO FEMALES Wiggle Smilie GO MALES Wiggle Smilie

Now that it has been brought to my notice, yes it is very surprising that most of the readers of LOTR and other stuff are males. I met the first female reader of LOTR books here on PT itself. I did try making a few of my female friends read the Hobbit and the LOTR but most of them said the Hobbit was too childish to be liked and LOTR was too huge to be read. But here, in my college, there is atleast one girl who has read Tolkien's works.

I can't believe that people would even say that LOTR is mostly for males, I mean ya, the only people that truly like it, that I know, are my guy friends. But like maydmarion said, she was an archer,which is totally wicked by the way, and I use my sword all the time, most guys don't even do things like that. Same thing with the RP war, I"ve only counted three other girls besides myself, they all think it's a guy thing, girls need to keep an open mind with things like that.
I must be odd then... I know a whole lot of girl and boy LOTR fans... but it is the probably the fact that I have been a geek/nerd my whole life and have classes with a bunch of Geeks/Nerds.

(but then again I cant wait till i turn 16 so i can participate in the midevil fairs. closest I can get to middle earth...)
That's so cool, the fair thing, I've never been to one, but they always look like so much fun.
I havent either but want to be a part of one badly!!!!!!! then i can practice archery and swordsmanship and horseback riding and hopefully blacksmithing.
Horsebackriding and sword play are sooooo much fun, as for archery, I haven't tried it yet, I'm too afraid to let the arrow go!

I wish girls could be more interested in this sort of thing, ones I know personaly, guys are always all for stuff like that.
Ooh, what a shame I haven't found this thread sooner! It is begging for me to jump in...

1. Most younger girls/women are too caught up in being boy/man crazy to worry about anything that could possibly enrich their minds and imaginations. A lot of it comes from how they were raised and what they were told to expect out of life, but also it can be personal choice, because to be a "typical" girl/woman is much more socially acceptable than being someone who is able to see beyond their earthly limitations. Sorry, to those girls/ladies that this statement resembles; it is a mere observation from one of your own. In my experience as a girl/woman, both single and married, the ones out of the female persuasion that are more likely to enjoy and understand LOTR and The Silmarillion are considered "strange" or "geeky" or whatever you like, and feel less of a social responsibility than their more "popular" counterparts. This allows them the freedom to explore the world and its arts and sciences and broadens their minds more. These ladies are fewer and fewer these days, it seems, because much more emphasis is put on attractiveness and social acceptance, pressuring girls to embrace the "norm".
2.In J.R.R. Tolkien's day, the socially accepted rule for a woman was to play the role as a kind of sidekick or accessory, if you will, to the man. They did not work outside the home, they did not drive a car or balance a check book or own businesses or receive higher education. The goal of a woman back then was to become a wife and mother and cater to her husband. Sometimes I think that in some respects, forgive me, that wasn't too bad of a gig for ladies, but also I am glad for the advancements women have made in breaking down what barriers existed so they can live a more full life, if you will.
3. Eowyn was quite the tomboy, but at the same time she was very vulnerable and emotionally charged, showing she was all girl. She is not my favorite character, though I admire her, but what is great about her is her limitless courage in the face of danger. Her rebellion against what was expected of females of the age is very gutsy and deserves respect from both genders, don't you agree?

There, that's better...any of you lads want to step up to the plate? Angel Smilie
While sexual stereotyping is slowly eroding, with women now taking positions once exclusively held by men, I think as children those stereotypes are still quite strong. What I have noticed, however, (and this may just be because I'm viewing it from a male perspective), is that it is far more acceptable for females to break the stereotype than males. If a girl wishes to climb trees, wear trousers and fire bows, that is perfectly fine. If a boy, on the other hand, decides to wear pink, wear dresses and play with Barbie, he will probably be strongly discouraged by his parents and be riddicled by his peers.

Away from this site, where thankfully there are a large number of female members, I know few fantasy readers who are girls. Roleplaying was the same. When I ran a regular game, my friends girlfriends would often turn up, but they'd look bored most of the time (unless they where chatting in the kitchen about kids etc). Maybe as genders we are inherently different. I know if I skim through Cosmopolitan or one of my wife's other magazines, I find them mind-numbingly dull. Pages and pages of adverts for cosmetics and hair products, or tales of how someone survived the breakup of a relationship. On the other hand, my wife cannot understand how I can find the tale of some soldier campaigning in the Crimean war interesting. She will point out that as what I am reading is in the past, it is finished and done with. What she is reading is here and now, and thus relevant to everyday life.

I think, then, we are very different, even if we would rather believe we are not. Fantasy, I would have thought would have been one of those cross-over points, although it frequently lacks the romance women appear to prefer.
I whole-heartedly agree with one of your points, Val. It is so true that women can more easily "get away with" being boyish, while men are not able to be "girlish" in any way because they will be ridiculed. It is sad that the playing field is still not quite level. Neither gender should have special priviledges over the other, period.


I find Cosmopolitan magazine not only dull, but almost offensive...what is so interesting about underfed women modelling clothes/jewelry/etc. and articles about cuticle problems? I do not identify with that whole genre of marketing to women, just as I can't understand ritualistically going to the salon or spa...but that's just me. Wait, no, actually, it's a lot of women that I know. Don't overgeneralize! Animated Wink Smilie Oh, and romance novels stink, just for the record. Smile Smilie
I can think of very few girls that I know personally that like LoTR, but most of the guys that I hang with and talk to are really into it. I even have a teacher that loves the Tolkien stuff and loves to discuss things with us and do little roleplaying things. However, I know very few girls who are willing to admit that they enjoy this kind of stuff. Not saying that there are not any out there, but I hang out with a lot of rednecks, so no one would really admit that if they did.
Neither gender should have special priviledges over the other, period.

No matter what you do women will always be the ones birthing babies. They are the natural mothers too.

Women get that special priviledge over men. Which I am very thankful for. In a perfect world women would be treated like queens, and they should be. But I don't want to be treated like a king, my ego couldn't handle it. There will always be and should always be differences. Which will always and should always create different priviledges. We were created different and were created for different purposes. Which will make different priviledges. That is what I believe. I would quote the Bible, but this isn't the place.
(but then again I cant wait till i turn 16 so i can participate in the midevil fairs. closest I can get to middle earth...)

That gave me a great idea. They should make a Middle Earth Fair. It would be similar but different. That would be so awesome. We could do it. We could get together, and travel all over the US or Europe and hold a Middle Earth Fair. Wow that's a good Idea...anybody else think so???
Sounds good to me. So long as it doesn't turn into a Tolkien optional copy of Renn Fest.
No matter what you do women will always be the ones birthing babies. They are the natural mothers too.

That's not certain. Maybe in some future babies will only be produced outside the womb with bio-engineering, or maybe in some distant future humans will reproduce purely by cloning or genetic engineering. This future shouldn't be too far off, as already today scientists are cloning and parents can already choose their baby's sex.

Maybe in the far off future humans sexes will even disappear because of this throughout the course of evolution (after all, we also lost our tails), and we'll all be equal once and for all. We'll all be Borg.
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