Thread: Odo
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Yes, Grey Pilgrim, all well and good. Now, can you please get off my thread. You make the place look untidy!
Only because you ask so nicely! 
..err... okay 
Hello, oblong!
I'll assume GB has removed a post- its either that or Wise Odo has moved into some sort of Da-daism phase.
He has indeed! Someone said: "Hello, circle." I replied with a geometric response (at least, I thought it geometric (if indeed that [i:3e5wd8za]was [/i:3e5wd8za]what my response was, math is not my strong point!) I wonder if "Hello, circle" is some kind of nasty aphorism, saying, or code? If so, perhaps this post needs to be deleted too? And I dread to think what: "Hello, oblong" might mean then... 
If so, perhaps this post needs to be deleted too? And I dread to think what: "Hello, oblong" might mean then... 
The offending post was a spam post whose link connected to a page already deleted by the Internet Police. So I thought I would follow suit 
.
[b:1ai33y3f]GB[/b:1ai33y3f]
.[b:1ai33y3f]GB[/b:1ai33y3f]
Wow! You leave no thread unravelled, GB! Bravo! 
Bravo! 
Hail !! Odo !
Many congratulations on your 1500+ posts ! I'm sure i've read all of them !!
I hope you don't mind if I say you have inspired me !!
May there be many, many more.
Many congratulations on your 1500+ posts ! I'm sure i've read all of them !!
I hope you don't mind if I say you have inspired me !!May there be many, many more.
QUALITY AND QUANTITY
[i:2090f73d]Quantity is not laudable unless Quality rules the roost,
The Truly Wise are only here to give Weak Minds a boost!
"Never fear!" said Sophocles, "that I will talk at all in vain,
"For I only exist to uplift the mind of those of Puny Brain!"[/i:2090f73d]
ARISTOTLE: How One Loves the Bottle (of Wisdom).
Wise words those, Manwe, and my sentiments exactly!
Wise Odo
NB Sadly, I have at this point in history, only made 182 posts.... I shall thank you in another 1418 posts though....
[i:2090f73d]Quantity is not laudable unless Quality rules the roost,
The Truly Wise are only here to give Weak Minds a boost!
"Never fear!" said Sophocles, "that I will talk at all in vain,
"For I only exist to uplift the mind of those of Puny Brain!"[/i:2090f73d]
ARISTOTLE: How One Loves the Bottle (of Wisdom).
Wise words those, Manwe, and my sentiments exactly!
Wise Odo
NB Sadly, I have at this point in history, only made 182 posts.... I shall thank you in another 1418 posts though....
Must have confused me for you, Wisey. Maybe should change this to the WISE ODO thread??? But in Hail's defense, I think his intentions were good.
Also: that'd be 1318 posts. Perhaps you should consult a maths book sometime?
But in Hail's defense, I think his intentions were good. Also: that'd be 1318 posts. Perhaps you should consult a maths book sometime?
PLATO's DISCOURSE ON DANGEROUS COUNTING (by PLATO)
[i:2p27e4g8]"Aristotle sipped from his Bottle,
And Wisdom flowed into his soul,
He said: "Why count the snacks?
Just eat a sustaining count of rolls!
Fresh bread rolls, sustain the flesh,
Does it matter if it's three or four or nine?
Remember, people will starve to death,
If they sit round counting all the time!" [/i:2p27e4g8]
I will say no more.
Wise Odo
[i:2p27e4g8]"Aristotle sipped from his Bottle,
And Wisdom flowed into his soul,
He said: "Why count the snacks?
Just eat a sustaining count of rolls!
Fresh bread rolls, sustain the flesh,
Does it matter if it's three or four or nine?
Remember, people will starve to death,
If they sit round counting all the time!" [/i:2p27e4g8]
I will say no more.
Wise Odo
Ahh its good to have things back to normal with the Odo brothers quibbling once again.
p.s. Ive never been quite sure how one goes about quibbling- does it involve a stick of some sort?
p.s. Ive never been quite sure how one goes about quibbling- does it involve a stick of some sort?
[i:32afrhte]Oh 'Quibbling is an Arcane Art,
(A far subtler game than bathtime farts!)
It's not for faint hearts or the thick,
(To dissuade the thick, use a stick!)[/i:32afrhte]
Grandfather Grumbly Banks. Excerpt from his memoirs: "Days of Buckie and Roses."
Wise Odo
(A far subtler game than bathtime farts!)
It's not for faint hearts or the thick,
(To dissuade the thick, use a stick!)[/i:32afrhte]
Grandfather Grumbly Banks. Excerpt from his memoirs: "Days of Buckie and Roses."
Wise Odo
Grandfather Grumbly Banks I suspect may have been deported from Scotsdale! He'd certainly fit in well here I like the cut of his crabbitiness.
Please, Mr Tyrant, we don't like to mention old Grumbly.... I really wish Wisey would control his channelling... (personally, and I don't mean to quibble, but he has little sense of propriety. "Wisdom!" Tush! What a waste of time - and Wisdom is not always respectable either! Some things should be kept secret, kept safe, I feel. )
)
(((((
Oh Petty, sometimes I do wish my Uncles would not hang out their dirty washing on this forum. As for Greatgrandaddy Grumbly, from what I've heard, and I've only heard very little of all there is to be heard, he definitely should not be heard about. Not in polite company anyway...
)))))
Oh Petty, sometimes I do wish my Uncles would not hang out their dirty washing on this forum. As for Greatgrandaddy Grumbly, from what I've heard, and I've only heard very little of all there is to be heard, he definitely should not be heard about. Not in polite company anyway...
)))))
In that case I rather look forward to probing and prying until I hear all there is to be heard about the very little you have heard, and heard all there is that has not been heard too about Greatgrandaddy Grumbly Banks.
And fortunately as a crabbity b*****d I don't qualify as polite company.
And fortunately as a crabbity b*****d I don't qualify as polite company.
In that case, Petty, when I get an opportunity, [i:160947uz]I [/i:160947uz]will tell the little I have heard, which I dare say will have to in poem form. Grandaddy Grumbly's story is one of those stories probably best put into rhyme - don't ask me why - and please don't ask me when - I'm already wondering if I should commit myself to such a venture! But for the moment, I'm flying with my family on an eagle to the Kimmberleys. Involves my work, if you know what I mean.
NB It is certainly not a story Mirabella should be telling you! I might have to get Wisey to do it, on reflection.
NB It is certainly not a story Mirabella should be telling you! I might have to get Wisey to do it, on reflection.
[size=150:2ijm6mc7][b:2ijm6mc7]The Tales of
Grumpy Banks[/b:2ijm6mc7][/size:2ijm6mc7]
Banks Family Memoirs
[b:2ijm6mc7]TALE ONE[/b:2ijm6mc7]
[i:2ijm6mc7]This is a Tale of Grumpy Banks,
For whom, Eru, we all give thanks.
Born he were in Rushock Bog,
In a stand of reeds beside a log.
His mother, Prudy the First,
Was cutting reeds at his birth,
Grumpy said, ’It’s 'bout time,
I were born, it’s after nine!’
Now birthing folk was different then,
It was pretty easy way back when,
In those days there was no fuss,
People were not the least like us!
Prudy barely groaned a groan,
Grumpy dropped like a stone.
He landed fully on his head,
In a muddy puddly reedy bed.
Prudy threw him up onto her back,
Then taking up her reedy stack,
Hurried him to her rustic hole,
Where Grumpy was put out of the cold.
Then Prudy got some thatching done,
Blown by chill winds in Wintry sun.
Grumpy wailed, ’I’m peckish now.’
So Prudy fed him a juicy fowl,
(The feathers did tickle his throat,
But in those days a baby coped).
Not long after that Dad came home,
Fogo cried: ’What’s this: a gnome?’
’It’s your newborn son,’ Prudy yelled.
And Fogo yelled, ’Oh what the hell!
What's he doin’ lying ’round?
When the reeds need cutting down!
Thatching’s how we earn our bread,
Drag that lazy slug from bed!’
So Grumpy grabbed a blade and ran:
That’s how his working life began. [/i:2ijm6mc7]
Wise Odo
Grumpy Banks[/b:2ijm6mc7][/size:2ijm6mc7]
Banks Family Memoirs
[b:2ijm6mc7]TALE ONE[/b:2ijm6mc7]
[i:2ijm6mc7]This is a Tale of Grumpy Banks,
For whom, Eru, we all give thanks.
Born he were in Rushock Bog,
In a stand of reeds beside a log.
His mother, Prudy the First,
Was cutting reeds at his birth,
Grumpy said, ’It’s 'bout time,
I were born, it’s after nine!’
Now birthing folk was different then,
It was pretty easy way back when,
In those days there was no fuss,
People were not the least like us!
Prudy barely groaned a groan,
Grumpy dropped like a stone.
He landed fully on his head,
In a muddy puddly reedy bed.
Prudy threw him up onto her back,
Then taking up her reedy stack,
Hurried him to her rustic hole,
Where Grumpy was put out of the cold.
Then Prudy got some thatching done,
Blown by chill winds in Wintry sun.
Grumpy wailed, ’I’m peckish now.’
So Prudy fed him a juicy fowl,
(The feathers did tickle his throat,
But in those days a baby coped).
Not long after that Dad came home,
Fogo cried: ’What’s this: a gnome?’
’It’s your newborn son,’ Prudy yelled.
And Fogo yelled, ’Oh what the hell!
What's he doin’ lying ’round?
When the reeds need cutting down!
Thatching’s how we earn our bread,
Drag that lazy slug from bed!’
So Grumpy grabbed a blade and ran:
That’s how his working life began. [/i:2ijm6mc7]
Wise Odo
Poor Odo Brothers. You have forgotten who you are! Is Odo posting as Wise Odo?
Of course not! As it turns out, Wisey has been collecting and writing down old family songs and so it happens, as I was going past the Hobbitonnet Cafe, he asked me to post it here for him. Any dunce would be able to work that out, surely! Well, maybe not [i:3ltz8jav]any [/i:3ltz8jav]dunce!
Well, maybe not [i:3ltz8jav]any [/i:3ltz8jav]dunce! Oh I do apologize. It [i:3s7kvk7y]is [/i:3s7kvk7y]obvious once one knows!
Hmmm... 
What....?
Nothing Odo, I just like to mess with you
Yabeddanotmezwidim gurl! ’'s gotfamlee, getma meenin? 
Odo wuz axin furrit Biffo 
. Now leave the Lady alone .
[b:3g3tzq7p]GB[/b:3g3tzq7p]
. Now leave the Lady alone .[b:3g3tzq7p]GB[/b:3g3tzq7p]
Old Grumpy's life story reminds me of my youth. Happy days farming mud in the mud glens of Auchtuchy. Where women were women (and stayed at home doing domestic things) and men were crabbity and covered in mud and children were silent free labour. Good times.
[size=150:156vp0i7][b:156vp0i7]The Tales of
Grumpy Banks[/b:156vp0i7][/size:156vp0i7]
Banks Family Memoirs
[b:156vp0i7]TALE TWO[/b:156vp0i7]
[i:156vp0i7]Another tale of Grumpy Banks,
For whom, Eru, we all give thanks.
Now Grumpy’s youth was never easy,
For pools are wet and reeds are greasy,
And if you cut and stack all day,
Your back gets sore (that’s what they say)
From predawn dark, round four past four,
Until well past six what’s more,
Grumpy would cut reed after reed -
Interspaced with three lean feeds!
Oh the work was long and tough,
He never could think quite enough,
Of adventures, of wine and song,
And lovely lasses with hair so long,
Oh yes he did get to dream a bit,
(If Fogo saw he’d take out the stick).
It was a dull and grey existence,
At last Grumpy became resistant,
And so one morn he ran away,
Sick of work and keen to play.
He took a boat across The Water,
Who did he see? The River Daughter!
(Not the one you’re thinking of,
This one was cut from different cloth!)
She was truly a sight to see,
’Oh handsome Stoor, come swim with me!’
That’s what the creature upped and called,
Grumpy was completely appalled.
’Hey! You look such an ugly thing,
What’s with the tusks and leather fins?
And your skin it looks like scales,
You’re so foul, my heart doth quail!’
’Oh dear Stoor, don’t be like that!’
’But you surely are an ugly cat!’
’I ’m not a cat I’ll have you know,
My Father is the Water flow,
And my mother was the Fairy, Moll.’
’You’re sure your Mum was not a troll?’
The Rivers Daughter laughed (or groaned),
’Oh what a crabbity soul you own,
Jump in the water! Come swim with me,
I promise joy ’ though temporary.’
Now Grumpy was not sure at all,
But not wanting to seem a rustic boor,
He dived right in and swan around,
(In Rushock Bog were heard strange sounds)
No one knows what happened between,
Grumpy Banks and the River Queen,
Of it Grumpy was never heard to speak,
But it’s said he had a grin for weeks.[/i:156vp0i7]
Wise Odo
Grumpy Banks[/b:156vp0i7][/size:156vp0i7]
Banks Family Memoirs
[b:156vp0i7]TALE TWO[/b:156vp0i7]
[i:156vp0i7]Another tale of Grumpy Banks,
For whom, Eru, we all give thanks.
Now Grumpy’s youth was never easy,
For pools are wet and reeds are greasy,
And if you cut and stack all day,
Your back gets sore (that’s what they say)
From predawn dark, round four past four,
Until well past six what’s more,
Grumpy would cut reed after reed -
Interspaced with three lean feeds!
Oh the work was long and tough,
He never could think quite enough,
Of adventures, of wine and song,
And lovely lasses with hair so long,
Oh yes he did get to dream a bit,
(If Fogo saw he’d take out the stick).
It was a dull and grey existence,
At last Grumpy became resistant,
And so one morn he ran away,
Sick of work and keen to play.
He took a boat across The Water,
Who did he see? The River Daughter!
(Not the one you’re thinking of,
This one was cut from different cloth!)
She was truly a sight to see,
’Oh handsome Stoor, come swim with me!’
That’s what the creature upped and called,
Grumpy was completely appalled.
’Hey! You look such an ugly thing,
What’s with the tusks and leather fins?
And your skin it looks like scales,
You’re so foul, my heart doth quail!’
’Oh dear Stoor, don’t be like that!’
’But you surely are an ugly cat!’
’I ’m not a cat I’ll have you know,
My Father is the Water flow,
And my mother was the Fairy, Moll.’
’You’re sure your Mum was not a troll?’
The Rivers Daughter laughed (or groaned),
’Oh what a crabbity soul you own,
Jump in the water! Come swim with me,
I promise joy ’ though temporary.’
Now Grumpy was not sure at all,
But not wanting to seem a rustic boor,
He dived right in and swan around,
(In Rushock Bog were heard strange sounds)
No one knows what happened between,
Grumpy Banks and the River Queen,
Of it Grumpy was never heard to speak,
But it’s said he had a grin for weeks.[/i:156vp0i7]
Wise Odo
As everyone seems so interested in the BANKS FAMILY, I thought I might as well set out some of the Genealogy. (Channelled - could be errors - no family papers close to hand).
[b:2yjfdg24]BANKS FAMILY[/b:2yjfdg24](Rushock Bog Branch)
Fogo BANKS m.Prudy [size=85:2yjfdg24](The First) [/size:2yjfdg24]BRACEGIRDLE ----- Parents of: Grumpy BANKS
Grumpy BANKS m. Gertrude GLOWYMUDD ----- Parents of: Bumpkin and Fogo BANKS (II)
Bumpkin BANKS m. Joylass GRIMPEPPER ----- Parents of Wisey and Odo BANKS.
Fogo BANKS (II) m(?) (1) Miranda CURR ----- Parents of: Biffo BANKS.
Fogo BANKS (II) m. (2) Prudy [size=85:2yjfdg24](The Second) [/size:2yjfdg24]SHARPKNUCKLES ----- Parents of: Mirabella BANKS
Wise Odo
[b:2yjfdg24]BANKS FAMILY[/b:2yjfdg24](Rushock Bog Branch)
Fogo BANKS m.Prudy [size=85:2yjfdg24](The First) [/size:2yjfdg24]BRACEGIRDLE ----- Parents of: Grumpy BANKS
Grumpy BANKS m. Gertrude GLOWYMUDD ----- Parents of: Bumpkin and Fogo BANKS (II)
Bumpkin BANKS m. Joylass GRIMPEPPER ----- Parents of Wisey and Odo BANKS.
Fogo BANKS (II) m(?) (1) Miranda CURR ----- Parents of: Biffo BANKS.
Fogo BANKS (II) m. (2) Prudy [size=85:2yjfdg24](The Second) [/size:2yjfdg24]SHARPKNUCKLES ----- Parents of: Mirabella BANKS
Wise Odo
When I read threads like this, I see how this forum is not your average forum. I do think Gandalfs Beard and Durin that you helm a wonderful ship here, even if not always exactly a [i:1ntxzppy]tight [/i:1ntxzppy]ship. Though I appreciate the more serious matters too! There appears to be something for everyone here:- Jane.
Though I appreciate the more serious matters too! There appears to be something for everyone here:- Jane.This is indeed not your average forum, Jane. It is a credit to Gandalfs Beard. He is a Gentleman, a Scholar - and a wag to boot. Perhaps, a wagging beard in fact! 
Hey! Rack off! This is my thread. The nerve... Oh, sorry... That wasn't polite. Hmm.. Will you miscreants kindly do your beard stroking somewhere else. Thank you.
[i:1tt64lni]Stroking beards might be very nice,
But kindly take my good advice,
Get ye gone from this Fine Thread,
It's for the Respectable, Bill Gates said.[/i:1tt64lni]
From "Keeping Vulgar People off Fine Threads." Steve Job.
Wise Odo
[i:1tt64lni]Stroking beards might be very nice,
But kindly take my good advice,
Get ye gone from this Fine Thread,
It's for the Respectable, Bill Gates said.[/i:1tt64lni]
From "Keeping Vulgar People off Fine Threads." Steve Job.
Wise Odo
Thank you for the kind words, Jane, but the true credit is in fact due to [b:33rwucpw]GB[/b:33rwucpw].
I've merely been skipping about these forums, deleting some spam posts here and there, and making some posts of my own as well.
[b:33rwucpw]GB[/b:33rwucpw] has been here and remained from the start, and really sparked life into the community here.
Three cheers for [b:33rwucpw]GB[/b:33rwucpw]!
[img:33rwucpw]http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/36.gif[/img:33rwucpw]
[img:33rwucpw]http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/36.gif[/img:33rwucpw]
[img:33rwucpw]http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/36.gif[/img:33rwucpw]
Sorry, dear Wise Odo! I simply had to give credit. Thank you for your understanding.
[img:33rwucpw]http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/6.gif[/img:33rwucpw]
I've merely been skipping about these forums, deleting some spam posts here and there, and making some posts of my own as well.
[b:33rwucpw]GB[/b:33rwucpw] has been here and remained from the start, and really sparked life into the community here.
Three cheers for [b:33rwucpw]GB[/b:33rwucpw]!
[img:33rwucpw]http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/36.gif[/img:33rwucpw]
[img:33rwucpw]http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/36.gif[/img:33rwucpw]
[img:33rwucpw]http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/36.gif[/img:33rwucpw]
Sorry, dear Wise Odo! I simply had to give credit. Thank you for your understanding.
[img:33rwucpw]http://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/6.gif[/img:33rwucpw]
Thankee Kindly Jane (and Durin) .
I see you're having fun with some of new smilies I've been importing from Narniaweb Durin
. I'll try and bring a few more to play with from the Leaky Cauldron too.
[b:2fcoeuo1]GB[/b:2fcoeuo1]
. I see you're having fun with some of new smilies I've been importing from Narniaweb Durin
. I'll try and bring a few more to play with from the Leaky Cauldron too. [b:2fcoeuo1]GB[/b:2fcoeuo1]
[quote="Gandalfs Beard":6e8c38l4]Thankee Kindly Jane (and Durin) .
I see you're having fun with some of new smilies I've been importing from Narniaweb Durin . I'll try and bring a few more to play with from the Leaky Cauldron too.
[b:6e8c38l4]GB[/b:6e8c38l4][/quote:6e8c38l4]
Indeed I am.
I looked at one of your posts where you had the man rofl-ing, and I went to Yahoo Smilies and noticed they were the same. So, I simply took the raw images of those and used them, which I think bring a great larger selection than to what we have available... though I do like what we do have available!
. I see you're having fun with some of new smilies I've been importing from Narniaweb Durin
. I'll try and bring a few more to play with from the Leaky Cauldron too. [b:6e8c38l4]GB[/b:6e8c38l4][/quote:6e8c38l4]
Indeed I am.
I looked at one of your posts where you had the man rofl-ing, and I went to Yahoo Smilies and noticed they were the same. So, I simply took the raw images of those and used them, which I think bring a great larger selection than to what we have available... though I do like what we do have available!
Sounds like Grumpy met a Kelpie. All sounds a bit fishy to me.
... I don't know... I don't want to know.... it's just a story Mr Tyrant... I'm sure it's just a story...
[i:h88cvekp]Who comes through dark tangled trees?
With spiky pate through stems and mist?
Bringing violence to all Men by word and deed,
Oh my God! It's the Screaming Feminist!
Worse than goblin, gropet and goat,
Worse than gargoyle, ghoul or ghost,
Worse than poltergeist, pug or Pope,
Worse than hangman with readied rope!
What? Liberal, Lesbian, Lecturer?
Evil tongued, bold baiting hectorer!
Will never be Man's-best-friend -
On closer look - yep! A Lesbian!
Through what gap or crevice, or openun',
In the Girdle of Middle Earth, hath she come?
Who let her in? Who opened the door?
Much worse than ogre, obgrat, and orc!
Ah! The Queen of the spiky haired brood,
Wild Idealistic Woman, that can't be gude!
Old Tolk would never have let her in,
Just mentioning her would seem a Sin.
Oh look! Out of the dark tangled trees,
With spiky pate through stems and mist,
Bringing her violence, by word and deed,
Oh damn the Foul Mouthed Feminist![/i:h88cvekp]
Germaine Greer from: "Lesser Known Works."
Wise Odo
NB I merely [i:h88cvekp]channel[/i:h88cvekp], remember folks. I take no responsibilty for what Germaine says or does!
With spiky pate through stems and mist?
Bringing violence to all Men by word and deed,
Oh my God! It's the Screaming Feminist!
Worse than goblin, gropet and goat,
Worse than gargoyle, ghoul or ghost,
Worse than poltergeist, pug or Pope,
Worse than hangman with readied rope!
What? Liberal, Lesbian, Lecturer?
Evil tongued, bold baiting hectorer!
Will never be Man's-best-friend -
On closer look - yep! A Lesbian!
Through what gap or crevice, or openun',
In the Girdle of Middle Earth, hath she come?
Who let her in? Who opened the door?
Much worse than ogre, obgrat, and orc!
Ah! The Queen of the spiky haired brood,
Wild Idealistic Woman, that can't be gude!
Old Tolk would never have let her in,
Just mentioning her would seem a Sin.
Oh look! Out of the dark tangled trees,
With spiky pate through stems and mist,
Bringing her violence, by word and deed,
Oh damn the Foul Mouthed Feminist![/i:h88cvekp]
Germaine Greer from: "Lesser Known Works."
Wise Odo
NB I merely [i:h88cvekp]channel[/i:h88cvekp], remember folks. I take no responsibilty for what Germaine says or does!
